asd 3 year old what is on offer? also advice re dla?

[tiredmummyneedswineandsleep]

ds is 3.2 high functioning asd and adhd.local support group no longer run.
salt isn't that often.
pre school wont have him any longer than 6 hours a week.
any ideas on what else we can do?
im a single mum who doesnt drive. soft play in our town is in middle of a dual carriageway so out of reach.
am hoping to claim dla so i can hopefully get taxi there etc as broke get no maintenance from the non existent 'dad' was wondering whether horse riding may help him too? any ideas on what to put on form?
cant do mother and toddler groups as ds is too lively at them and we dont fit in was too stressful and we didnt gain anything from them.
what do you do with asd pre schoolers if your mum to one?
should he be receiving play therapy etc.. feel so isolated and low.

can't help on much but wanted to bump you...

have you thought about a trampoline? meant to be really pleasurable for the asd and uses lots of energy on the AHDH group (often worth checking out the small ads, make sure to get the net walls too). Horse riding sounds expensive

my son (asd) really like woods... long walks in any local wood or green space might help - look out for annual memberships to places with adventure playgrounds. They are expensive but if your using them on a daily/weekly basis a whole lot cheaper than indoor play areas.

also check out whether there is an early years sen service in your area - if there is ask your nursery whether they apply for an inclusion grant (??) and get one-to-one for your little one

Side issue - have you tried nagging the CSA to investigate? Also have issues with useless ex, sometimes have a weekly phone call to CSA, thankfully at the moment as there are other court proceedings pending he is paying

If you use the Cerebra guide to the DA it is a great help. Someone will hopefully link it for you.

Second a trampoline, they are great or burning off energy.

Have you tried the NAS website for any local groups?

ooo and I think there are some charities that'll help with the form google "caring for the carers" (I think)

I think you maybe should try and tackle the issue of pre school only accepting him for six hours per week. As a three year old shouldn't he be accessing more sessions than this? Your LEA early years team should be helping you with this. they can give funding to help pre school give your ds more suppport so he can access what other children his age are entitled to. you could also try contacting social care or the community nursing team for children with disabilities I struggled for years with ds1 (ASD) and it was only through the community nurse that i discovered a fantastic playscheme for children with SN. (this was after the summer from hell, which left me feeling very low). Riding for the disabled do have local groups in a variety of areas, but i think children have to be 5. You might also find this difficult to get to without transport.

thanks will look up cereba. feel like dla would help me be able to give ds a better quality of life. as just to do soft play is 4 buses 2 each way as our towns is inaccessible without a car. with a ds with his needs its hell and a long walk after the buses too. cant do normal activities for his age as he is pretty much out of control.
my mum bought him a trampoline but its still in box at her house as need help to erect it and not sure about being able to use it now winter is approaching.
rang csa today nob head ex isnt receiving benefits so more than likely doing cash in hand work
rang NAS last week but after excitedly ringing local contact for support group was told our local group no longer runs. surely ds isnt only asd boy in our town? feels like it.
feel such a shit mum bloody miserable all time and like im failing ds, wish i could help him more.
can never et hold of my new health visitor always seems to be on a course, off sick or on holiday. asked if area has a sen health visitor but we dont.

thanks any ideas on how i would contact social care team? may ring hospital tomo to see. just really struggling with it all.
am awaiting a multi agency meeting but the paed needs to attend r.e pre school and he hasnt responded to any emails, phone calls as et 2 weeks on.

Ring your local council and say you want to speak / be referred to a social worker in the children with additional needs team. Don't let them fob you off. Can I ask why pre school will only take your ds for six hours? This doesn't seem fair at all.

try open air playgrounds early morning 9- 10 o'clock time (if you can) when it's quieter
Also bigger pushchair to get him there easier?

thanks will ring them tomo.
didnt know there were such a team.
they say he is too disruptive and its not fair on the 29 other children.
i am mad as i dont think its fair on my son either he cant help having asd/adhd. he hasnt been officially diagnosed but paed agreed with me he can see signs of both and then wrote to the pre school and lea to report his findings and say ds should be treated as if he has a diagnosis of both. not done any good as he is being treated unfairly.
i pointed out to the head that its discrimination and that NAS told me this. he said if they take ds any longer they will end up saying they dont want ds there at all if he hurts another child. he hasnt hurt anyone yet and there are other children who have. feel like he is being treated so badly. i work in the main school there part time so its bloody awful.

have baby city jogger mini as he's height of 5year old but he undoes harness and escapes. used to have maclaren with a better harness but as he is so tall he used to drag feet along floor and then broke/buckled wheel having a tantrum
i know there are people out there worse off than me and feel bad complaining all time but i feel so low, a failing mother and have frequent headaches and bad stomach which i'm convinced is stress related.

This is awful and they are not treating him fairly. I think you need to push the LEA hard on this. I started out being grateful to people for taking on my ds and ended up realising that I had to start being very assertive about what he was entitled to. Your ds is entitled to the same amount of nursery hours as any other dc. It is the responsibility of the LEA's early years team to ensure he gets it either at the pre school he attends or another one. I would put your concerns in writing and ask them how they are going to ensure your ds can access an appropriate early years education. It might be a good idea to find out who is the early years advisory teacher for children with SEN for your area and address your letter to them, send a copy to the pre school, and your ds's paed. If you don't get any joy from this, send a sterner letter to the head of children's services at your local authority. I feel incensed on your behalf tiredmummy. These people really piss me off.

thanks will do, am definately not going to keep being nice. even when i tried being assertive i was fobbed off. i will be ringing social services tomo.

just want to wish u luck,my son nearly 4 and waiting diagnosis of asd,nursery take him 2 1/2 hr a day.they have only just agreed today that they feel he has autism,.im single mum with 3 others at home and dont drive either so i really feel for u as im lucky nursery will take him every afternoon .hope u get some help soon xx

thanks rang social services today. was so scared kept reiterating to them I can cope with DS at home etc and he isnt at risk of harm, neglect etc.. just that i wanted ds to be getting all he is entitled to etc.. had to ring in to request a referal with the children with disabilities team.
also took ds to a lovely centre on other side of town which is for children with disabilities. the staff, mums and children were lovely and we are welcome back every week. they had a small soft play area, sensory room, large room with toys and enclosed garden with cars, trikes and big trampoline. they've also booked us in for 2 sessions in half term. have offered help with dla form. so lovely and has reminded me that there are decent, caring people out there.
cant wait to go back next week.