Paed appoinment advice please?

[AnakisT]

Hi

I have posted before about my dd. Briefly she is 31 months and has a large speech delay. During her 2 year review the HV flagged her as being delayed in everything and was concerned about her 'quirks'.

Long story short (!) we have been referred to a childrens assessment centre. I've had a paed appointment though for this week, i have been told that it will last 1 to 1 1/2 hours.

I don't want to seem dim! But does anyone have any idea what to expect? It's so quick i only saw the HV a month ago.

Any questions i should ask? Also my instinct is to be defensive of my dd (like anyone) i feel terrible that i'm going to have to be negative and pick out the things she does as negatives IYSWIM.

Any advice would be gratefully recieved.

Hi, it seems they vary quite a bit.

Another fellow Mnetter (in a diff area to me) had one that involved asking her child to draw circles etc (he is not 3 til Dec! and also has some speech issues)

Mine did not involve anything like that at all - our paed is lovely, he was straight down on his tummy on the floor playing with DS. Though my DS def has some quirks and some oddness that I can't pinpoint, he is not delayed in other areas but only has about 15 words and no words together at all and nothing that "sounds like" anything iyswim? All the experts are so far stumped by him and although he is bright he has basically made no speech progress (or very minimal) in the last year.

On wed he is to have a sleep deprived eeg

My paed asked me loads of questions about how he was as a baby and played with him. And I reckon it lasted about 45 mins to an hour - though didn't feel like we were in that long!

Sorry prob not that helpful, but maybe it depends on the type of referral?

in terms of what to expect - they are likely to want to know about your DD's development from in utero onward, so if you make a mental note of ages she reached her milestone. they will take a detailed history from you, and may ask a few questions about you and her father, e.g. whether either of you spoke late, that sort of thing. they are likely to also want to see how she communicates/plays, and get her to do some simple drawing/jigsaws/playing with blocks. they might come to a conclusion right away, or may want to see her more times, each area works differntly.

in terms of questions to ask - the big one is - what's going to happen next, in terms of support/referrals to help your DD with her difficulties.

Hi, my DS (22 months) just had his first paed appointment at a children's centre. Like you said, it lasted between 1-1.5 hours.
She (the paed) spent about 15 minutes talking to us and finding out what our concerns were, then she carried out a number of tests designed to assess cognitive (including verbal), social and motor development. This was all done through play / interacting with DS. For example, he was given 3 shapes to put in a puzzle, asked if he could point out parts of the body on a doll, and was assessed to see if he could follow instructions.
A physical/neuro exam was also done (my DS is very behind in gross motor skills) to see if there might be reason to suspect a particular cause for problems.

The paed asked questions about general development from birth (e.g what age did your child smile etc) and discussed diet.
The appointment concluded with us being given the results of paed's findings and being advised as to what would happen next.

We have just had the paed report sent to us and from reading that it would seem that they look at a scale based on your DC's chronological age, work out the milestones they should be reaching and base the assessment on that. My DS was found to be a few months behind in some areas, more in others and was classed as having mild developmental delay. However, we have to go back in 6 months to see what progress he has made and only then can they begin to put together a picture on how he is progressing.

I know what you mean - it is really nerve- racking (I too am defensive of my DS and make excuses for him not reaching milestones to myself), but it is best if you just tell the paediatrician about the areas you are concerned about.

I asked quite a lot of questions (I am worried about ASD, so I asked lots of questions around that, but to be honest, I felt fobbed off because DS is "too young" to diagnose with that).

All the best with your DD's appointment

That's fab thank you!

A big part of me is hoping that he will think there is no problem although i know there is IYSWIM.

I don't know what will be relevent in terms of her quirks though. I don't want to walk in negatively but i also don't want to 'brush things under the carpet'.

God! It's such a minefield!!!!

be honest, 100% honest. don't gloss over anything. so you won't look back and feel - should I have made more of anything.

please be honest and dont feel bad about being negative. You need to be truthful to get the help your LO may need, good luck

from a treatment point of view, they have to focus on what she can't do, so they can plan the next appropriate steps and how best to bring her on. it is shitty to feel the professionals don't care about what she can do, and seem negative, but it is unfortunately what they have to do.

Hi Anakis

We had our first paed appt a couple of weeks ago, with DS3, 15m. It was just over 2 hrs, and do be prepared to feel physically & emotionally exhausted afterwards! They will likely ask loads and loads of questions right from yours and DD dad's childhoods, through to the pregnancy, and he development since then.

It may be an idea to make a list of all you want to mention to take with you. The questions that they ask should cover most things, but i know that we got home and thought of a couple of things we wished we'd asked. List any concerns you have had since birth, whether or not they seem relevant to her present difficulties.

I DO understand though that you don't want to be negative about her though. I know i came out of the meeting thinking that if i hadn't have said all the stuff that i did, then she wouldn't think that he has the problems she suspects (potential ASD plus chromosomal problem). However, deep down, i know that i have to be honest about his difficulties in order to get him all the support he needs. So, as others have said, be as truthful as you can. Also make sure of what the action plan / next steps are before you leave.

Good luck, and let us know how it goes

Again.....Thanks so much for all the help and advice.

I'm feeling much more confident now about what to expect.

Will report back later in the week......