One step closer to dx

[sumum]

Just come home from seeing the community pead with ds, she said she would support a dx of asd if salt think he meets the critria.

Salt is seeing him in school on thursday.

I think he has asd, I am expecting him to have asd, I want a dx to help explian him and meet his needs, so why do I feel like she has punched me in the stomach.

Feeling very flat and down now.

Has he been seen by a SALT before, in my experience community peads will not do anything until they have some SALT input. You are lucky that pead is saying they will support you. Dd3's pead has sat on the fence for 18 months despite SAlt saying there are issues. We have now been given a new pead so fingers crossed.
You don't say how old your DS is or how long you have been in the process of getting a dx. Sadly the wheels turn very slowly, keep going, if you Ds needs a dx I am sure you will make sure he gets one.

He is seven and has been with commumity peads since reception year when he was four and a half, this is the third referal to salt, first when he was two and I mentioned asd traits then.

He already has adhd dx so it's feels like it's been a long time coming.The asd has been somewhat overshadowed by the adhd I think, but now that he is on meds the asd traits are more obvious.

It is so true about the wheels moving slowly, ds is on his fourth teacher who is saying he has problems and is struggling with him.

When do you see your pead next ineed? There seems to be such long gaps between appointments too.

My Dd1[22] was nearly Dxed with ADHD when she was 9, we believed all along that it was something else but no one would listen and eventually they blamed my parenting and discharged us. I have been on the dx road with Dd3 since reception and she is in y3 now, I have just been told that we wil be getting another pead appointment in half term.
It is school who have slowed everythin down for us, because they keep saying there are no problems and Dd3 is nigh on perfect.
I really feel for you and understand your frustration, don't give up fighting for recognition for your DS.

Yes ds is in y3 too.
It is frustrating esp when they think it's down to parenting.
Today I tried to tell pead some of ds difficulties such as lashing out and not getting dressed and she suggested a parenting course. I have done all that and do use all the parenting tricks I know but it's still hard work.
I wish it were as sipmlpe as going on a course and '123magic' and all the problems dissapear.

How is your dd1 doing now she is an adult?

, she has good days and bad days, she has a Dd of her own but needs loads of support, she does well on a day to day basis, but when things go wrong or routines change she finds it hard to cope, luckily she has a good support network. I find it much easier to help her now she lives away from home but have had to do a few mercy dashes to rescue her. Her poor theory of mind gets her into difficulties quite often but hey she is getting there, running a home, holiding down a job and looking after a little one.
I agree about wishing we could go on a course to make all the problems go away. I have tried so many stategies over the years. Am using a red and yellow card system with Dd3 now which we are having some sucess with.

wow she sounds fab, job, home and baby!. I also have an older dd(21) who has a baby, my dgs is 8 weeks now and lovely.

Glad your card system is working well, we are back on tick chart at the moment, have to keep changing things to keep it fresh and exciting.

Charts have never really worked with the Dd's but yes we are finding visual reminders work well with Dd3, have you tried the marble in the jar on,e I first saw it in school with an ausie teacher, it worked really well with Dd1 for a while. Have never done it with Dd3 though, she doesn't get reward systems at all. Anyway her marbles are like the crown jewels so i don't think she would want to put them in a jar, and can't buy anymore because it would take all night to count them back into the box.

Sumum - I felt the same when the paed eventually said ds had asd. I was expecting it- but I still felt shattered once it was said in black and white. I had expected to feel relief we had an answer - so grief was unexpected!!
Ds was also diagnosed with adhd first (age 5) and ASD 3 years later. I had suspected ASD all along but once ADHD medication slowed him down to mere superhuman speed, like your ds the asd became very obvious to all. Ds also has MLD.

There is nothing that gets my back up more than professionals shrugging and suggesting standard parenting courses!! However, when the local respite service offered a course specifically for parents of children using their services with LD and CB (most also have ASD) I signed up! I am uncertain how valuable it will be, although it is supportive to be with other parents struggling with similar issues. The issues are so very unique!!
Any way take care of yourself. I got rather down for a while - while I came to terms with the DX.
Actually life ( ds is in year 6) is much calmer now. The asd Dx has helped alot in understanding ds.

I attended a sn parent support course - more aimed at parents needs (you know handling feelings, getting the most out of professionals) and that was really useful!!

thanks magso, its good to know your ds is coping well and life is calmer.

I felt really drained last night and had an early night, am feeling bit better today. I have several rl friends who have children with sn so have been talking to them too.