Should I do this or not?

[fightingthela]

Long story but ds (10) has possible AS/HFA. 2 EP's this year suspect this as do we but Ados was negative so am now requesting further tests and assessments. Life at school has gone rapidly downhill and almost every day there are incidents and he comes home in tears. He is incredibly anxious about everything but keeps getting punishments (missing lunchtimes) because of being 'rude' to staff. He raised his voice the other day because of a stressful situation and explained to LSA it was because he was stressed - was told this was not an excuse and sent to HT. Had punishment but kept asking why he was having to stay in and confused about what he had done wrong. I feel like writing to Senco (as I have other query around IEP) pointing out that he still may have an ASD,even though test was negative,and wanting all staff that work with ds to be made aware. Would also like to remind her what AS traits he has. is this unreasonable? Worried it will cause even more problems.

I would write an idiots guide to your ds and state that although the ADOS test came back negative you are awaiting further assessment and that the 2 EPs are in agreement with you.
That because of this it would be wise to take his social communication issues into account when dealing with him.. Use unambiguous language and instruction and gently remind him if he is coming across as rude.

Also state that you are concerned that because he is becoming overwhelmed this is leading to a deteriation of his mental health and he will need support with social interaction not only with his peer group but with adults... And that his needs in all these areas should be flagged to all members of staff.. So not to cause any confusion.

you could ask if the county website has a document called ' understanding AS' as ours does .. If not ask them if they would like some information for professionals from the NAS.. As he is deffinatley showing tendencies toward AS.

Hope that helps :)

Basically go along the cautious side of dealing with ds and his needs so not to cause any further harm to his emotional or mental well being. Remember they have a duty of care.. And any of the above will not cost them any money to impliment.. It is just basic common sense and a touch of caution .

That should work especially if the eps agree with you.. Which they should.

Thanks for comments so far.He also gets shouted at by HT/DHT despite me advising them that he has sensory issues (exceptional hearing) and gets very upset by it. Ds told me today that they told him he was being treated just the same as all the other children as he feels he is being treated unfairly. 5 children have been asked to write their reports of the playground incident - wtf! When he wrote down some comments and asked LSA in detention if he wanted to hear them was told "you can read them out but I won't listen and I won't answer any questions until you show me some respect". This is the LSA that has just been given to him to help with playground incidents.

Oh I had to have words with school about making ds write incident reports!

Bloody useless thing to do IMHO

In light of what you have just said.. I'd call in some back up and call a meeting with SENco and bullet point your agenda for the meeting..
Firstly get a hard copy of the schools SEN policies.. you will be able to pull them up on their own layout for SEN and meeting your sons needs.
Ask them during the meeting ( once you have highlighted his needs, using reports you have) if they are able to meet his needs. You will either get a yes or a no ( ask them for a yes or no answer) if it's yes.. Ask them point by point how the intend to do this.. If no ask them if they will support your application for a statement so that your sons needs are met. If this is a no.. Ask why they won't do this.. As his needs are clearly not being met through current provision for him.

A dx shouldn't matter.
You can ask parent partnership to attend the meeting with you.. and you can ask the schools SEN governor to attend.
Basically what you want to be doing is headingthe meeting and cornering them ( with a smile) through their own policies.
Then at the end of the meeting.. That you have minuted. Ask those in attendence to sign to agree your minutes.
Make sure you write .. Action to be taken. For each bullet point.. And try and get time scales.
Then clarify this all in a letter after the meeting.

Hi Arsenic - ds wasn't asked to write a report he chose to do this to try to get his points across. Just had a review meeting (15 minutes).We are going through assessment (after being told we wouldn't get one) and EP was really positive that we would get a statement. Haven't had her report yet so can't use that as ammo at the moment. Everything had been fine until this year so can't see what's changed. Dh and I did have a bit of a moan to Senco a couple of weeks ago about lack of staff understanding and apparently she was very upset about this. They wouldn't suddenly become really difficult to deal with because of this would they? Am a governor there and they are aware that I am very clued up on Sencop etc..

Ooo that's great that your a governor and you have sencop down to a tee.. ( that's half the blooming battle).

I would like to say that whether or not SENco was upset.. It would be highly unprofessional to allow this to effect the duty of care and meeting sons needs.
This doesn't mean that this hadn't happened though.
I just hope it hadn't.
A 15 minute meeting is not long enough.. Seriously call another one.. ( ask them for a good hour) and head it like a business meeting.. do you have any OT, Pead or SALT reports to use?

My son is 6 and his ADOS test came back negative but after further assessments he was diagnosed with autism,it is not unreasonable to remind them of the problems he has because they dont seem to be helping matters.I think its disgusting how they are treating your ds.