For those at the begining or starting out on the SN road

[TheArsenicCupCake]

You know .. I've been going through old paperwork, old diaries etc.. And I know lots of us on here tell you

" you will grow a thick skin"

my god have I turned into an informed old boot! :o
in the nicest way possable!.. looking through the old papers I was soooo worried about everything, didn't know how I'd cope, didn't know who to nag turn to for help.. The list goes on trust me :)

I'm still learning everyday, I still get things wrong.. But I at least now wander about with an air of knowing what I'm doing :o
( I have got good at pretending .. And repeating" one step at a time and it will all be okay" at least).

So if your new and overwhelmed.. " you will grow a thick skin".. You will be able to do what needs to be done and you will turn into am old boot like me :o

Im working on it!

Lovely post. :)

Ah this is music to my ears, ds has just been dx with asd and I am feeling like don't know quite where to turn - thank you

I think that it's easy to look at lots of ' old hands' on here with an air of ' those people are.. So strong, can cope, know what they are doing etc' .. And forget that we all started off knowing nothing and having lots of wobbles!

The wobbles don't go away.. But they get less and you get used to them.
:)

BSAB.. I hope it's okay to say congrats on your dx.
You still have the same child you know and love.. But you have a starting point to know where to start if that makes sense.. And that really helps :)

there are lots of lovely things to come your way as well as some bumpy bits..
Although I would have ds2s life easier for him.. I would change him for the world.. he is my perfect if not quirky boy..

I wouldn't change him for the world ( ooops)

These are wise words.

I've slowly turned from a crumbling wreck to a lean, mean, school/LEA/DWP/Paed fighting machine.

I have been dubbed 'informed and dangerous' by ds' headteacher, in the nicest way I hope

I don't care how unpopular I make myself to get him the help he deserves.

It's nice to know how much progress he has made due to my nagging efforts.

Lovely OP Thearsenic. I can remember being totally overwhelmed by it all, in fact i still am at times, but i know that i have mn on hand and that someone on here would have been there, done that and have the t-shirt.

I have had a kick up the arse when needed (i wont mention any names Starlight ) a sympathetic and understanding ear when needed too and support from here.

I can remember quite a few advising me to apply for a statement and it all seemed so complicated. Every question i asked seemed to lead to apply for a statement, i was so unsure. It was the best thing i could have done, my only regret is that i didnt do it sooner.

Lovely thread :)

I remember feeling bewildered after DS's DX - so many emotions and worries and so much information all at once.

This board has helped me see that there is life after DX - its also helped me find things that I can do to help change my S for the better, as wel as being a shoulder to cry on and someone to share those moments of pride.

Yes it is true, my skin is 70 years old and 3 inches thick all over! I am still working on the chinks in the armour plating!

I am actually slightly over 40 but, ho hum, yes, my crusty thick skin is well and truly developed.

Thanks for this post.

You've summed up where I was and where I want to get too! Four months down the line I finally feel I'm heading in teh right direction.

Can't believe with all the professionals paid to support their is no on eto help you navigate. Horrified as to how people who aren't as able, articulate and plain bloody minded as me must get on x

Thank you x

Slm .. :o oh I thought that too!
I'm glad tbe post has helped out a little.

it is so important that SN parents are supported because the fights and worries can seem a mountain to hard to climb sometimes.. And that is on top of everything as it is.
so an understanding ear and a leg up or a map to navigate helps all of us support our dc's.

" informed and dangerous " .. I like that :o

thanks for this arsenic... reassuring and kind.

Arsenic thank you, I appreciate what you've said. Tbh I have 'known' for so long now about ds that the diagnosis itself wasn't a real shock. And the best thing is that (mainly thanks to Mumsnet!) we started ABA a month ago, regardless of the dx, so at least we can feel we are doing something for him already. And yes you're right, in some ways I feel so much more relaxed having the actual dx - the awful year of swaying/denial/fear/anxiety of 'is he/isn't he' is over.

It is just so true though, wtf do people do who just have no idea of what help is actually out there, and don't even know they don't know. Iyswim

I love 'informed and dangerous' . Oh I do hope I get there someday!

I too have been helped and supported by all your experiences and wisdom, and also loved 'informed and dangerous'. (I sign my emails to the (wonderful) parent partnership support worker 'scary mum' and we have designed a costume to match!! )

I was also told, I forget by who, that dealing with professionals is like chess, not all in wrestling, and that has proved so useful, so whoever you were... thank you

Thank you to all advice on mums net. Just starting the wheels in motion myself with my 8 yr old daughter. I am at the bottom ready to climb the mountain and determined to get to to the top. Parent Partnership Officer coming tomorrow can't wait to get everything off my chest. You are all a magnificent help for frustrated mums like me. Without you all I wouldn't have known which way to go and probably have left the school continuing to fob me off (as they do).