His first day...

[jayzmummy]

is tonmorrow and he has been awful the past two days.
DS2 has been really violent and I spent two hours at A&E today as he has broken DS1's nose

DS1 is really upset because its his first day at secondary tomorrow and he has to go sporting two black eyes and his poor nose taped up

DS2 has hit the next door neighbours boy this afternoon and has kicked me several times.
He hasnt spoken since yesterday morning and every time he sees his new school bag he empties out the contents all over the floor.

I know he is worrying about starting school and the fact that the taxi will arrive at the house and I have to just pop him in the taxi and wave good bye is really worrying me. There is supposed to be an escort....but the taxi company havent found anyone to fill the post as yet

What on earth happens if DS2 tries to climb out of the window....he once tried that before when I was pulled up at some traffic lights. What happens if he goes off on one and attacks the taxi driver? DS2 is not going to like the fact that he will be sharing the taxi with another pupil...so what happens if he whacks her one????

Im sounding like a really neurotic parent but I am seriously concerned.

DH has booked some time off from work so that he can be here for the next few mornings just in case DS2 goes of on one...its easier if we are both here to deal with the violence...it took both of us to hold him down tonight whilst he was trying to kick the sh*t out of DS1.

So what would you do if the taxi arrives and he is having a bad moment....would you just force him into the taxi and hope for the best or would you tell the taxi to go & drive him to the school yourself???

I did discuss the possibility of DS2 refusing to attend school on his first day with the head teacher before school broke up and she said we would cross that bridge as and when it happened!!

I didn't think they could take him without an escort tbh. Is there no way you could go with him at the beginning? I did and lots of my friends have done this, just to settle them in and see for yourself what's going on. Poor you!

Poor you (and poor DS1). Don't think I'd chance the taxi tbh. Do you have a car? Could you take him yourself or maybe take him in a taxi yourself?

Ive talked with Dh and we are going to telephone the taxi company and tell them not to call for DS2. We will take him into school...it is after all his first official day at school... and then we will talk to the head teacher about our concerns.

Good luck Jayzmummy, will have everything crossed for you all tomorrow.

i would have a chat with the head and/or senco asap. has the school set up enough support ?
hope that thinks go well for you all.

I would definitely take him yourself if you can. You can phase in the taxi, it makes perfect sense. Then it will work better and you can relax. I've had a lot of ups and downs with school transport and now send him on transport in the mornings and collect him 4 days a week, home on transport once a week. Works well.

I'm surprised there is no escort, IME when we have no escort on eof the TAs does it for OT.Especially if there is any risk.

Hi Jayzmummy - I had everything crossed - how did it go today?

I telephoned the taxi company to tell them not to come and collect J....but they were already on their way. The godzilla queen on the other end of the phone was giving me grief over the fact that I have to call at 7am to cancel school transport....it was 7.15!!

Taxi arrived and J refused to come down stairs. DH went and told taxi driver that there should have been an escort and as there wasnt we were not prepared to let J go with him....for the taxi drivers safety more than anything!

DH and I finally arrived at school at 9.30am....it took me 30 mins to get J from under his bed and into the car!!!

We received a phone call at 12 to say J was not happy and what did we want to do....collect him or leave him? Then Head Teacher came on the phone to say that she felt we should leave him there. must give in etc to his ways. Transport problem had now been sorted and J would be having single passenger transport with escort and driver. So he stayed and came home in the escorted car.

Its a husband and wife team and they are so lovely. They collected J from school at 2.30pm and drove the scenic route via the coast road....stopped and looked at the sea for 5 mins and then came home.

J stomped up the path, threw his book bag at me and then marched up the stairs and slammed his bedroom door....not a good day then???

The driver and his wife stayed for a cuppa and we had a chat about J's ways. They are coming in the morning to collect him at 9 and we are going to play each day by ear....the school will contact us to inform us what time of day J will be coming home.

He has refused to eat tonight and the book bag was thrown out of the bedroom window!! Theres been lots of crying and even more slamming of doors....my poor neighbours must be being driven mad by the noise.

A little concerned that the only thing written in his home/school diary is a sad face drawn by the teacher and the word sad written underneath it. J said "cried much at school inside no one sees"....Im sure he means he was feeling sad inside I hope he hadnt been taking himself of to the toilet to have a good cry....thats what he used to do at mainstream and then the toilet became his safehaven.

I know its a shock to my system not having him around all day and that its bound to affect him. Just need to give it some more time.

Tommorrow is another day....fingers crossed things go a little smoother.

jayzmummy, I do hope things improve. Really pleased that the driver and escort are nice and understanding and sorry that J is sad and having such a difficult time. Good luck for tomorrow.

I've been wondering how it went JM It sounds like you've got a good team in the taxi though, they can be so wonderful when they're good. One of my friend's DSs goes home with his escort as she is also a respite worker and his mum doesn't see him until 6.30pm!!! Not sure I'd like that but it makes such a difference if you get someone decent and you can get to know them. Good luck for this week!

he will soon settle into the routine of the taxi and school, sorry it has been so traumatic for you all