What do you think of this?

[pucca]

Ok bit of background for anyone who doesn't know the problems with my ds.

He is 4, just started ms reception. He has many sensory issues, rigdities, obsessions, social interaction delay, basically global delay, ASD and ADHD traits, still in full time nappies due to impacted bowel, sleep disorder (on melatonin). We are currently under CAHMs after 18mth of seeing paeds at CDC. Just recieved a proposed statement for school.

Today school have sent a letter home to every parent in the school addressed from a little boy in ds's class. This letter is basically stating about the fact this boy is autistic and highlighting his difficulties.

Now I am quite shocked as to how this has made me feel! There are a couple of other children in the school who are ASD but this hasn't been done before. I can understand how his mother feels (ds has just gone through a stage of attacking other children) but to do this? I am a bit about it, I haven't felt the need to shout it from the roof about my son, so why on earth has school allowed this?

What do you think?

Pucca, I find this really interesting as I don't know if something like the letter would be well received or not.

I'm considering it but I would worry it would make my son a talking point, a child with issues, rather than taking him at face value. On the other hand, mums and other children can see he isn't the same as others and can behave in a rather unusual way. Would they find it easier to include him if they know why he is different?

If the school offered to do this for your DS would you reject it?

Do you know what? I actually flinched when I clicked threads I'm on because I thought that's it now I will get lynched...but I couldn't have been further from the truth.

Thankyou all so much for being so understanding, and the posts since I last posted have hit the nail on the head really.

Chocoholic...Yes my other issue with the letter is that I feel for the mum now, I think she has opened herself up in a way to more attention. No I don't think I would be happy with a letter like this going out about my ds, I think it would put him in the spotlight even more. I actually cried when I read this letter down to the sheer frustration I feel.

I have talked to a few selected parents about ds, I have had the fear of people talking about him as there has been alot of hitting & punching going on at breaks & dinnertimes, and the HT has even shot me down about this when I mentioned that maybe he needs supervision. I have done what I can so will just have to wait on see on this matter.

Anyway thanks so much once again for all your advice and understanding, It means alot.

There is a boy in my ds's class who is probably Asperger's but his mum wanted to keep it quiet. I only know cos she told me. She also said she did not want her ds labelled. The other mums and children in the class do not like him cos they think he gets special treatment eg. when everyone has to sit down, he is allowed not to etc. Makes him very unpopular. I think that is unfair to that child as he does not know why.

When ds started hitting and kicking, I gave permission to the teacher to talk to the class about it as I felt that the other parents should know why their children were being attacked. I was hoping that someone would point out that perhaps school should be handling the situation better - that all the children should be protected - but they were all being understanding etc. and no one complained. I was hoping that I would get support for my view that ms is currently not the best place for ds.

Hope you feel better.