Advice on how to progress please?

[boythengirl]

My DS had a meeting with a paed. last week and in short he appears to display ASD traits. He has just started school so we agreed that we should see how the next 3 months go and then have another meeting with the paed. She, the paed, advised us to brief the teacher on where we are up to and that she will need info from them for that consultation.

Our DS does not seem to 'make friends' and this was feedback form his nursery last year. It's not that he is a loner as such but like to do things on his own or alongside others. It's like he deos not know how to...the intuitiveness is not there? this is one of the main areas where we are looking for 'evidence'.

Given he has just started school we were reluctant to say anything at the start. Our main concern is that he does not get a label up front and therefore treated differently (esp. as he has not had a diagnosis yet). But now we don't know what to do or the best way to deal with for his sake? what should we say?

So I would really appreciate any advice as at the moment feeling scared and just want to do what is best for him.

Thanks in advance.

Sorry a bit tired tonight, so apologise in advance if i'm not answering the right question.

I would list all of your son's difficulties and take it to school to make them aware of the issues, maybe ask to see Senco.
You don't have to mention the possibility of asd yet. Just focus on what he struggles with and ask how he can be helped.

HTH.

I'm not sure you'd be doing him any favours by holding back information. The teachers can use their knowledge of ASD to make school an easier experience for him and without this info may label him as badly behaved instead.

I'd explain the outcome of the appointment to the teacher and also let her know my reservations about labelling. The teacher can then be ready to contribute observations to the diagnostic process if necessary.

This is a difficult time for us as parents so try to cut yourselves a little slack while you get your head round it all.

Teachers don't always know very much about ASD so may not pick up on it and just brand your little fella 'naughty'

You don't really want him to start school on a downer. It's in his best interests to share the info with them - they may be able to get the ball rolling with an IEP and stuff for you.

I would let the school know. Dd1 started reception when we were waiting for dx (Aspergers), i told the school straight away and they were great, the reception teacher did lots of research into AS to prepare for when dd1 started. Dd2 (ASD) has just started reception on the staff have been great, luckily dd2 had a dx before she started and we managed to get a statement, staff have been trained and things have been put in place to help dd2.

Spinkle- i'm sorry i don't agree, most schools now have knowllage of ASD as more children are being diagnossed, most schools have children that are on the spectrum (dd2's school only has 80 students and at least 3 are on the spectrum and are recieving outreach from the SN/ASD school). Things are looking up for ASD children in MS schools as more people/teachers are becomming aware of it.

I would speek to the SENCO and explain where he struggles. Also i would not worry too much about the social side of things in reception, i worried when dd1 started school but after waching the children in the playground it seems that most of the reception class don't really socialize and often play alone. Dd1 is now in year 2 (her 3rd year) and now has friends, she still plays alone from time to time but she is also happy to play with other children (in groups).

Thanks, Have decided just to be completely upfront whith them whilst expressing our concerns about any labels at this stage. It's playing on my mind so much so I think it will be a relief when I have that conversation with them!

I dodged labels for ages. I don't think it helped my ds at all. People are far more understanding of him now.

Marne - I def. see your point. I work in an ms school and I have far more knowledge of ASD than our SENCO (funnily enough!) we do not have any diagnosed ASD in our school so our staff have very little experience of it.

Except when they meet my little chap which comes a bit of a shock for them!!

There are only a couple of children with an asd dx at Dd3's school but this is not because they are not there it's because the HT/Senco is not referring them. The only children being seen by peads are the ones whose parents have gone down the GP route!!
Boythengirl I would definatly keep the school informed, it will benefit your lad in the end even if he doesn't get a dx.