Is ASD passed on through the family?

[AlisonDubois]

My DS1 has been told he may have ASD. What shocked me most was that it was felt that I myself could be the same . Am gobsmacked...how could I not know this?

As Jusatbout said, rally.

ASD isn;t always genetic as in passed own (eg there is for example spontaneous genetic mutation, where it is a once off), and there may well be otehr causes such as brain damage. We don;t really know, yet.

We do know however that there are genetic links (I have 2 with ASD, one with dyspraxia (linked), and a wide smattering of obvioously-ASD types through my family).

And even where there are no obviously ASD relations, there is often traits, OCD, depression...

But not always.

The ED Pysch told me this. I assume she has experience of this in children. She seems to think I also have it because of, as she put it, poor body language, lack of communication and absence of eye contact.
TBH, I do have a problem with eye contact and communication. I never, ever approach others to make first contact. When I do get into a conversation, I am aware that eye contact is non existent, although I have made efforts to stop this.
What she maent by poor body language am not sure, although I do have a tendancy to try to dissapear into the background physically, IYSWIM.
So basically, she is saying then that DS could have this because of me?
Have not told his dad...dread to think what he will say.

What a strange thing for her to say. Can an Ed Psych even dx ASD?

That's what I wondered. But she says she sees children with this condition all the time, so am bit confused. Also, what is the point of telling me when I can't do anything about it now, I mean there's no cure is there, so why?

OK now I am wary.

Ed PSychs shouldn;t really diagnose- ther are a few certified to diagnose by PAediatricians who tehn sign off the diagnosis but I am talking about a very few speiclaist individuals. generally an ASD diagnosis is given by a Paed, or a Psych.

And it should be given after many tests and assessments including a full history. You categorically CANNOT diagnose ASD by meeting someone.

And those things you mention are not purely diagnostic criteria- look up the triad of impairments. Those things you mention could be down to shyness, being a bit upset, hungover, nervous..... indeed there are many kids with ASD who can for example make eye contact.

now I am not saying you don't have an asd either and if you do it's up to you whether you seek further diagnostic input (and I am an adult who knows she fits but has chosen not to seek a DX at this stage) but I would be very wary indeed.

FWIW gold standard diagnostic procedure as per my studies (2 kids with ASD; diagnostic and other elements of MA in ASD passed, just aetiology adn research taughts left) invovles full history with verification (eg parent) if at all possible; assessment by speech, OT, possibly GP or OT; input by at least one outside person who knows you (for a child usually school); use of validated standardised assessment tools- ADOS, ADI-R, etc.

For an adult that can be nnarrowed often but still an Ed Psych is not trianed to siagnose adults with ASD.

Be wary.

What do you suggest I do...not sure whether to take this to heart and worry or just ignore?

WRT to the what is the point thing though-

When I first relaised, a few months into my studies I went rock bottom for a bit. Absolutely: attributing all I ahd achieved to the vagaries of ASD (such as an ethical code I am proud of)and convincing myself I could nto ever improve on teh things I struggle with.

After a bit though I saw it differntly: now it gives me permission to ahve failed, to understand why and know how to change it in teh future (I struggle with maintaining friendships for example, responding to emails etc- I dont mean to, but I do) and it amde me realise how proud I am of what I have achieved despite a few extra hurdles. It becmase a positive and has helped my self esteem enormously as I now don't think of myself as unlikeable or odd any more, just me.

Alison if it were me:

Firstly in all truth I wouldn;t let my child see such an unprofessional Psych again nd would ask for a new practitioner.

Secondly I would advocate doing nothing. At all. For a while. Let the potential information sit, maybe read aroudn it a bit, se how you feel in time.

It may have use for you- indeas etc or may be something you dismiss.

Psych was out of order.
Like others have said it's not their job to DX anyone.
My three kids all have autism, their dad also had aspergers we believe, what has been suggested happens next?

I have to point out here that she did not actually diagnose me but she 'suggested' that I had it, based on numerous previous meetings we have had with each other.
DS and I have always seen the same ED Physc so she may have come to this conclusion due to previous meetings, maybe, do you think?
Oh God, all I know is that I now feel really bad because I feel that my behaviour socially has affected my DS1.

Firstly to answer the title.. It seems so.. Exdh doesn't have a dx but I strongly think he could be on the spectrum somewhere.

However ds2 is my only dc who has it.. Maybe he was just unlucky.

As far as the EP suggesting anything .. Well I wouldn't be happy tbh.
where to go next.. If you think this idea fits your child.. Talk to the gp with a list of concerns and examples.. And ask for a referral.
be warned the whole process can take a while and you may jolly well met lots of different people.
Sancti and others have already given you lots of information .. So I'll leave it at that.

Your behaviour socially would not have affected your DS. Yes, to an extent you do learn social cues from parents, but much more than that I think the average NT child learns social cues from interaction with peers, and from instinct. If you follow your logic, then all ASD children would also have ASD parents, and that's clearly not the case.

I'm not quite so horrified by the Ed Psych as others - from what Alison says, she's met the EP several times and from the EP's POV, if she suspects that this is something that is worth exploring, was it really better to do/say nothing?

Hi
I'm on the autism spectrum. It's a different brain design that happens before birth, from what they're seeing. There's no clue whatsoever, from anyone, how it happens. Lots of theories but no answers. There can indeed be a genetic link but sometimes/fairly often there isn't.

Yup, Ed Psychs are not able to diagnose, though some point people in the right direction.

Most adults on the autism spectrum have never had a diagnosis. It was only really made available from the mid 1990s, and for women it's really been the last five years or so. Why? Because they thought it was a condition that was always very severe, almost always affected boys, etc. And so they designed questionnaires for professionals that asked questions that boys would answer yes to (but girls probably wouldn't) e.g. "do you collect information about trains?" (er, no...women tend to collect shoes, handbags, ornaments etc...)

Thus, most women still don't have a diagnosis and don't have a clue that they're on the spectrum.

Some, when realising it's a possibility, ask their GP to refer them for diagnosis. Expect a huge waiting list. Or, if there's money, they might go to a private specialist (the National Autistic Society can point people in the right direction for this).

Is a diagnosis worth it for adults? It can be but it's a very personal choice. For me it was great, because it meant there were reasons why I'd found things so hard. And I learned ways to do things better or help myself more.

If you have a child on the autism spectrum, (as I do), having a parent who's also on the autism spectrum can be very handy, because we can show them how we've coped so far. It's certainly not a greater or lesser problem than having a parent who isn't autistic (though some of us need a bit of more specialised help with parenting skills).

Have a large cuppa. Much to think about. But there are so many good people in this world who have forms of autism.

Both myself and my two lads are all on the spectrum.

I have 2 boys and a nephew with diagnosed autism, a brother with undiagnosed aspergers and a late uncle and grandfather who were definitely on the spectrum, though again, not diagnosed because high functioning autism rarely was diagnosed way back when, plus a whole world of quirkiness scattered throughout my family.

I know for a fact I'm on the fringes of the spectrum myself. My boys have provided me with a lot of lightbulb moments about my own quirks. I struggled socially at school until I was in my teens, but I protected myself by very comfortably being able to adopt the role of class boffin, since, like DS1, I was a gifted learner. That, of course, furthered my existence as a loner and opened me up to even more bullying than if I'd just faded into the background.

Those difficulties are behind me. I'm not a sociable person, but that's just as well, since it helps me to cope with not being able to have much of a social life because of the boys. My lack of gross motor coordination doesn't bother me, since it's not like I have to do any sport and I have ways of dealing with all my sensory issues.

So, I don't see any point in seeking a diagnosis for myself, since it's not like there's anything to be gained out of it, other than satisfying my curiosity, once and for all.

So, like other posters have suggested, having been dropped this bombshell in a rather unfortunate manner, would it make any difference to you if you were diagnosed, or are you fine with carrying on just as you were? Did the comment make you think "now that explains why I find xyz so damned difficult." and make you really need to know more so you can get to the bottom of an issue that's been bugging you for a long time?

Alison
it is not your fault.

If it is genetic then are you going to blame your parnets, or their parents, or howvevr far back you could go.

No one is responsible for any genetic issue.

My DS2 seems to be our only family ASD link in spite of huge family. But I think there are more than one route to ASD

I'm trying to think back here to the time of DS's diagnosis, seven years ago.

At the time, realising just how many of the diagnostic traits I'd always shown as a child came as one hell of a shock, and I also 'blamed' myself for passing it on to him. I mean, I both gave birth to him and mostly did the bringing up, how could it not be my fault?

I did as Sancti said, too, and reanalysed my life and achievements in terms of Aspergers. So anything I was particularly good at was 'just because Aspergers children have that sort of brain', nothing to do with the hard work I'd put in, and anything I was lousy at was going to remain that way forever. I think at some points I was seeing myself as sort of sub-human, and feeling guilty for tricking DH into marrying someone who couldn't really relate to other people (cos that's what all the rather silly oversimplified autism information tells you).

It took a while for common sense to creep back in. As I say, it can be a hell of a shock.

Give yourself time, though. You'll gradually recognise that a lot of what is written about Aspergers and autism is bollocks not a fair reflection of the people involved. Frankly, my son with Asperger's is one of the nicest teenagers I could want to meet (and much less selfish and self-obsessed than his supposedly neurotypical brother). I do realise that his personality and his very good school situation currently make it easier for us than for many families.

DS himself (computery type) likes to say he has a different operating system, which doesn't always interface well with less specialised systems.

Oh, and you asked how could you not have known it? Well, how and why should you? Shouldn't think any of us had heard of it as children, and by the time you reached adulthood (IF the EP is right anyway) you had probably found your own ways to cope.

Is there, in fact, anything from your childhood that does make you think she was right?

Lancelottie - I love that analogy. I might suggest it to DS1, because we've been talking a lot about his autism, lately, since he's been asking about why DS2 does and doesn't do certain things.

I think that it can be a dominant gene - so one of the parents (me) might have traits - but not ASD and then in the next generation these traits get magnified and become full blown ASD.

lol..i am loving lancelotties ds's analogy