Would I be unreasonable? (ds just started ms school)

[pucca]

Ds started ms school on Friday, so today was his 2nd day. He is in full-time nappies and I have to keep a bowel diary (for the nurse who comes to the house) so I asked his teachers to record down if he poos.

I put a little book in his bag along with a pen to record it all in, so Friday I just got a no soiling or poo today. Today I got...nothing.

I also have been told a TA was sorted out (ESAP funding band B until statement done) but no one has told me anything, I also have no idea how things are going, what support he is getting or anything.

Would I be unreasonable to ask for a daily report on what he is doing? how he is behaving? and to know what support he is/will be getting?

I am thinking I will put it all in writing instead of putting this across verbally, I also need to make it clear I need to know about his bowel motions (ds said he did a poo today and teacher changed him).

What do you think?

I think yes you need to set up what you expect as a parent now especially about the BMts.

Have you a home school book? That could be set up easily and what I have done in the past as TA is have a behaviour score for AM and PM and luch for children I have worked with behaviour issues etc 10 being Fantastic 1 being not so good. When I did not have time to write this is a good guide tosee how he has done.

Ah brilliant idea SaliMali1 thankyou!

Yes, you need a home school book. We got one after I objected to being collared in the playground about my ds' latest wrong doing. It's hard in front of all the other parents (esp. when I am a teacher myself)

I always work on the assumption that no news is good news now.

My DD just started MS school too, we have a diary, its hit and miss at the moment whether they write in it....but ill give them a few weeks to settle in to the habit....they are trying. :)

You need to go in and talk to them, write down all your concerns.

Dd2 has just started ms, she has a home school book which her TA writes in each day and i can write in, i also try and speek to her TA every day. Dd2 is statemented and has full time 1:1. Keep on at them until they do as they asre told.

hi pucca, how's ds liking school? As others have said, home school book is the way to go, allows you to write a quick note to the teacher too, may be you could start with, please fill in poo diary Dd3 has one, doesn't get writen in every day but then some days nothing that interesting happens!

Ok thanks everyone, I really appreciate the input.

Bigcar...Hmmm not so sure, he hasn't cried or anything but only on the 2nd day today he has had that 'rabbit caught in the headlights' look.

This morning I felt like crying for him as I left him at the door with his bags and drink and he was struggling to get his coat off...Just wanted to help him (me being soft prob) just feel he is thrown in at the deep end at the mo.

I don't know....Thanks for asking

oh pucca, have some unmn like hugs. I know the feeling well. Hope the week improves

Thanks bigcar, How is your dd3 getting on? Has she settled into school?

thanks pucca, she has a much better 1:1 this year and has made the world of difference to her confidence so it seems she has almost settled already, something I didn't think she'd managed at all last year! I'm still not convinced ms is right for her, she's too far behind and almost non verbal but she's happy so that will do until I can sort something better Hope you managed to get something sorted with ds school.

Just wondered if the nurse (or even the school nurse at a MS school could have a good rapport with the staff?) could drop a line to the school saying how important this info is for her. It might make them see the importance. I need to get the school to keep a poo diary next week for the gastro team - should be interesting!

Bigcar...That is great news!

So glad for your dd3, and you!, as I have a little understanding of how frustrating it can be.

Auntevil...Good idea! I think I will look into that Thankyou. Good luck with your poo diary, let's hope they do it for you.

We have home school book but also go in to school once a week at 8.30am for 10 min chat with teacher to check what is going on. Believe me if you don't you will find out at the end of year things you thought were sorted out the year before. ie my DD came home with an award for eating with a knife and fork. She had been doing this for years, at home and in her previous school, but had obviously regressed without anyone telling us. Also found out at the end of one year that teacher had placed her sitting with her face to the wall and her back to the rest of the class for the whole term. Tell them that if your child is doing anything that would be unusual to let you know. I think sometimes they don't want to tell you bad news.

We follow morning meetings up with a quick email to teacher and senco to confirm any issued we have bought up, as found the teacher didn't write anything down.

Daisysue...I am getting a little of that already! in the first week, luckily I have dd (6yo) there to tell me things.

Ds has been hitting lots of other children, including dd and some year 2 kids. Nothing was said to me though, I asked the teacher today and she said "oh yes, but it is sorted now, got your dd to talk to him" WTF! why on earth is my dd being dragged into it...I despair I really do and it's only day 4!

We have homeschool book essential as ds goes by transport and his school speech unit to far to drop in plus he is pretty much non Verbal

It's wrote in some days when information needs to be shared but on Friday teacher does a general letter to all in unit and highlights what's relverent to each dc

so far he is doing ok though is issues with his other dx that might mean he will only do a year there

Roundthebend4...Glad your ds seems to be doing ok, and it sounds like the home/school diary is essential to him and you.

I think it would help as then at least you can talk about what they have written, keeps you in touch with what they do at school.