school trip and inclusion

[halcyondays]

dd is 4 and has had a multi-disciplinary assessment, they said it is likely she has Aspergers. We are waiting for a date for her ADOS assessment.

The main issue in school is her toileting, she has chronic constipation, is frightening of pooing . She will not poo on the toilet and can soil many times in the day, although not every day. The school are trying to get her a Statement so she can have a 1:1. At the moment the TAs are changing her, TA and teacher are lovely, and much more supportive than her nursery teacher last year.

The Head has asked if I can go with her on school trips, as they don't have enough ratios to cope with her if I don't go. It seems that they are only taking teachers and TAs on the trip. They haven't ask any other parents to volunteer as apparently it's hard to get parents to volunteer at this time of year or to get their CRBs checks done in time. But apparently mine can be done in time.

I would be quite happy to go on the trip, if I didn't have childcare issues. I have a 2 year old dd who wouldn't be allowed to go with me, due to insurance and I have noone to look after her at present. DH has a broken leg so couldn't look after her for that length of time and I have no family that could do it. Despite explaining this I've been pressured to find childcare and told that she won't be able to go on the trip if I can't go with her. Of course if I'm not happy with that they would cancel the trip. I would hardly expect them to cancel the trip but AIBU to want them to make reasonable adjustments so she can be included?

I said the only possible thing was IF I could someone to drive me down separately with both dds, but the only person I could ask is my 77 year old dad, who we've already had to ask for a lot of help getting dh and dd to hospital appointments. The trip is an hour's drive each way, so he would either have to stay, or else go home and come back, which would be mean 4 hours driving in total.

Then it seemed to be taken for granted that I would be able to get someone to drive me down, when I had only
ever said it was a possibility.

Apparently the school have gone out of their way to support us and I'm expecting a lot from them. By wanting dd to be included in a school trip?

I think they are on dodgy ground, here, to make you come with her. Having said that, I think they would be within their rights to cancel the trip altogether on grounds of Health and Safety generally

I'm wondering how they manage to have enough adults to have a good ratio when they don't use parent helpers. What would the ratios usually be for trips with 4/5 year olds? Maybe 1:5?

I understand there are no set ratios, but that they are supposed to do a risk assessment taking into account age of children, where they're going, children with SEN etc.

At one point he did say that he might be able to give us a lift, if all else failed, but then later said he didn't know what he had on that day.that would certainly help, although I'd still have to occupy dd2 who probably wouldn't be able to join in the activities.

I would be happy to go the trip if I didn't have childcare issues and said I would go on the next trip if dh could get time off. He needs to use a lot of his leave taking dd to hospital appointments.

I'm made to feel like a nuisance purely for wanting dd to be able to go on a trip like everyone else and as though I'm deliberately being awkward when I genuinely have issues with childcare.

They don't need CRB checks for one off trips. We always have parents come on our trips. It all smells a bit fishy to me...

Indigo dd old school used to insist on crb checks for trips just not the enhanced one

Though they used to ask me to come all tine as had enhanced one