Losing the will to live with this DLA form...

[Eloise73]

I need help, i'm going crazy, I'm so sick of this form I just want to rip it into 60 million pieces.

How am I supposed to know how a normal 2/3 year old would react compared to my DD? I need to keep comparing her to a neurotypical child and say what she needs over and above but I only have one child, I work 4 days a week and don't get to attend most of her playgroups. So all I know is DD.

I think i've done alright describing the help she needs re autism but i'm at the point now where I think i'm just going to post it and be done with it, they will probably say no anyway :(

I am attaching her CAS report with her diagnosis and explanation of her severe speech and language delay/communication delay, is that enough?

Would be grateful for any advice.

They should send a voucher for a free bottle of Gordon's with the damned forms...

They should supply a bottle, shouldnt they!

The DLA is provided on needs and not dx, so you need to describe how it affects your dd and what you need to do for her, that goes above and beyond another 2/3 year old, extra things and what the consequences would be if you didnt.

Also include any therapy etc, you give.

So for example you could say that you dd keeps you up half of the night. They would say that many 2/3 year olds wake often during the night.

Describe why she wakes and what you have to do.

I am sure anyone who has filled in the forms will sympathise. Don't assume you won't get it. Have you used the Cerebra guide? Found that really helpful.

I totally sympathise. It's impossible to know what normal children need because what we live with is normal for us.

Don't give up on the form, you'll only regret it if you get turned down.

Have you got good friends with children around the same age? You could get them to look through the form and tell you honestly what support their child needs so you have a realistic comparison. If you don't have someone to ask then post the questions on here - I'm sure you'll get plenty of answers.

Take your time with the form. It really does drain most people and leave them feeling depressed so don't try to do it all at once.

The key to the whole process is to focus on what you have to do for your child each day and write it out in detail in every appropriate box. Don't forget to include things you think she needs someone to do but doesn't get because you don't have time - they still count as needs.

Chin up - you'll get through it.

I hope you've got some Gordon's and some chocolate to hand.

I just shut off from it completely and wrote it as if it was about a child I had never met but who needed DLA.

Thank you all for the support and advice.

I do have the Cerebra guide but I wasn't sure how much extra I should write.

LeonieDelt: What supporting docs did you include?

I didn't send much extra in at all but was happy with the rate we got. I didn't send any reports and they didn't contact my GP or the Community Paed.I am not sure there is any rhyme or reason in it.

The form is EVIL!!!!

Have you tried the Contact A Family helpline- a caseworker filled out the form for me (it took us 5 hours over 2 days), but if I'd been left to my own devices I would have run screaming from the room. It's worth giving them a ring, I found them really helpful :)

This is why I haven't applied! ..

I do plan to but I am not doing it on top of everything else I'm dealing with right now... I may be brave one day!

Don't say I never do anything for you.

This is the table the assessors use as a benchmark of what a child "should" be able to do at each age.

I didn't send a lot of proof in last time, and this time all I'm sending in is the Annual Review because that has physio statement, school nurse report on her epilepsy and also her assessment on the P scales. The form itself ... well I wrote rather a lot on that, and it went in in a ring binder. Nobody did any checking on mine, either - there really does seem to be a "if it weighs more than a bag of sugar it costs more to assess than it does to just give them the money" attitude.

R3dh3d.... Don't suppose you have a table like that.. But for older children??

it may help with my bravery gathering :)

R3dh3d: Brilliant, thanks for that although i'm a bit sad to see a few things my DD cannot do yet that she should have been doing over a year ago :( It will help thanks.

I will include the private SALT reports we have as well as the CAS report and the NHS OT report. Plus i've typed up a 5 page '3 day diary' of an average weekend with our DD and everything we have to help her with, support, encouragement, engagement, guidance etc

BTW, do you guys fill in the boxes with numbers or do you write 'all day' or 'constantly'? No idea what numbers to put down.

Ooh I'd like a table for older children too please if anyone has one. My 10 year old can't do the things that one says 6 year olds should and we've just been told that he can't have high rate as apparently he hasn't got a severe learning difficulty.

Do you have a Carer's Group where you live? They came and helped me do the form - and I was renewing my claim. The woman I dealt with was very experienced with filling in the form and seemed to know what they want. She also looked at the reports and told me would support my case more. She will at least get you through the form and then you can amend it later. Also, do a diary of what your child's daily routine/difficulties are and what help you provide. You can always send that as a supporting document. I think my diary, shich seemed to show a person breaking down, probably helped my case i.e. at what hour, xx peed on bed again... tipped 2 bottles of shampoo on the carpet.

hi im filling in the renewal forms for a child turning 16, he has speech and language and communication problems, and behavioural because of frustration, very hard to fill in, i need help with the problems he would have if he found himself in an unfamiliar place, and so on. help!

Eloise regarding the numbers. For most things I (and the person who helped me last time from welfare rights group) put constantly or frequently throughout the day. Some things like DS's toileting rituals are usually a set length of time and then I did put numbers in the boxes but with most things I didn't even try and then put a note at the end emphasising that it was mostly about always being on hand. (My Ds is 15 with HFA and OCD). Getting DLA seems to be a bit of a lottery. I have not had any problems but know others with a least equal dificulties have. So if you don't get it appeal. CAB is another place to ask for help in addition to those mentioned above.

I tried to think as an 'outsider' to our lives and our son when filling it in. Also if there are any close family or friends who know you well ask them. My mum came up with several things I hadn't thought of just because they had become so normal to us I had forgotten thats not ehat happens in other families.
Also if your child wakes you at night or needs you in the night regularly make sure you put it on the form as that counts as needing help 24 hours a day. You need to think of how things are on the worst days.

this thread is really old!

Laurapaul, you need to start your own thread.

I have still got to do mine. I just can't seem to. Trying to take incentive from you all.

This is a zombie thread.