Hi I'm new- Looking for opinions Mainstream vs Special Needs

[LunarRose]

Hi I'm new but I've lurked for a couple of weeks. I have a DS who is 3 who is going through the dx process for autism (not really a surprise, we know he's different!!!), But we are lucky cos he's settled in a nursery, has one to one, a good early year sen team - something I know a lot of people have to fight tooth and nail for!!!

Now the debate Mainstream vs Special school

With my eldest DD just starting school yesterday, I've got to thinking about DS starting school next year.

There is a super specialist school 45 mins away, but with a super Early year sen team working to get the help in place already, I'm wondering whether it might work in MS.

SO looking for experiences and opinions the good the bad and the ugly!!

Ps. Have benefitting hugely from the lurking, big thanks!!! it's so good to know that other people are worrying thinking about the same things

Our situation is the same as Lougle. Inclusion for ds1 was total exclusion. At mainstream ds1 was not allowed near other children (he wouldn't have harmed them - he never has). He was tethered to an adult at all times in case he ran out the building and was killed on the road (still our major fear and he's 11 now). He wasn't allowed on school trips unless I went (he had full time 1;1 in his statement).

At special school the doors had high handles and locks - suddenly he didn't have to be shackled to an adult (he can reach them now but the layout means he is safe within the building). Within the first term he was going to the school office independently to get the register - this would never have been possible in mainstream. His curriculum his fine tuned for him. He learns what he needs to learn. He goes out all the time - and we really see the benefit of that when we try and go out at home.

We haven't had a battle since ds1 has been in special school. We battled constantly in the mainstream years.

We are lucky with his school - it suits him - it's as near to ideal as we will get for him - this wouldn't have been the case for every special school.

We really struggled with this decision too and having visited schools still struggled..

We decided to opt for a split placement and dd starts on tuesday at sn school where she'll spend 2 days a week and on wednesday she will start at ms school where she'll be for 3 days a week. She'll have a 1-1 from sn school staff accompanying her in the ms setting which should work really well.

DD has been in ms nursery with a 1-1 and many of the familiar children will be at her ms school and that will be lovely for her and I hope she'll benefit from the social interactions she has with these children.

We will review at half term and see how things are working.

We think it may be that year 1 will bring a full time situation at sn school retaining some links with the ms school but we'll see.

Both schools have a good relationship and seem flexible enough to focus on what dd needs and seem open to changing arrangements if necessary as we go..

I'm still dreading it though!

Actually that's another good point. A lot of special schools have units on mainstream sites as well now for the more able children. Not sure if anything like that exists near you but would give an opportunity to trial mainstream or access it as much as is desirable.

My DS has ASD and LD. Both are fairly mild (although his LD is classed as severe in educational terms).

I assumed he would be mainstreamed. Never crossed my mind he would go to SNS. Two years of MS changed my mind.

I moved him to SNS at Easter and he is now reading. His scores now register rather than being classed as 'working towards' everything. He is happy and has friends.

I think his school is far more inclusive than his previous one. There he was pretty much alone and his 'friends' teased him and got him into trouble.

His new school has children of varying needs and abilities. Everything has to be accessible for everyone, therefore everyone is included. Much more than I can say for his last school!

DS1's SN school has 6 pupils in a class. DS2's MS school has 30 pupils in a class.

This must be at the core of a good proportion of SN kids failing in MS schools (and a lot of MS kids failing in MS schools)?

we went for a unit (mild to moderate learning difficulties and different disorders) attached to a mainstream. The deal we got is mornings are taught in the unit and afternoon in mainstream with support giving him the opportunity to have the best of both worlds.

I didnt think my son would have coped in MS with 33+ and the support they had provisionally outlined was a mother of a speech delayed child with no teaching qualification at all.

I think it all depends on the child's strength and weaknesses, the school, the statement, and my logic is I can always go to MS but its harder to get a place in SN school or unit.

Just wanted to say a HUGE thank you to all the posters I think everyone has added something to my thoughts and understanding. I too love the idea of inclusion, but really worry about whether this will work for Darling son

At the moment giving serious consideration to the SN school and I think this is what I want to be aiming for over the next year.

I know it probably sounds a bit daft but I keep thinking that DS is somewhat of a square peg and might be better if he's in a square hole not a round one.

Visiting the school 2 weeks time. So looking forward to it!!!