Am I being pathetic... I need a hand hold!!

[Ineed2]

Dd3 [nearly 8] has been invited to stay with her Grandparents [ my mum and step-dad], for 2 nights next week. She has never been away from home without me before, she is currently being assessed for aspergers. She has been asking to go since last summer, When I talked to her about staying for 2 nights she looked worried and said she wasn't sure, then I told her that she would be coming home in GM and Gd's car and she said she doesn't like their car becasue it smells [she does have issues with smells]. Now I am so worried but I feel stupid, they have looked after both the other Dd's without too much trouble, I think I am worried that something will upset her and they won't be able to calm her down.
I have tried to talk to my mum but she is not good at taking advice from me and thinks that she knows how to handle Dd3 I don't think she would phone me if Dd3 wanted to come home.
Am I being pathetic, am I holding Dd3 back, does she need to have this experience?
Hope someone has some advice.

hmmmm!!! think I am in for a couple of sleepless nights

Go for it!

My aspergers son is constantly suprising me with how much he can do. Yes you will worry - but hopefully you too will learn she can do more than you think she can.

How far away does her gp's live? Dd1 (6) went to stay with her grandad a few months ago, after one night i had a phone call to come and pick her up, luckily i was only a 10 minute drive away, she was fine once i got her home and now she's asking to go again .

Try not to worry, i'm sure they will phone you if she gets upset.

I would be worried if anyone was looking after any of my NT children and wouldn't phone me if they wanted to come home.

So make your mother promise she will phone if necessary, regardless of what your mother thinks. Also tell her if she can't promise this then your child can't stay.

Can you bring her home? If the car does have a smell, then I can understand your daughter's issues. It could be anything, air con, air freshner etc. Again I and my children are all sensitive to smells, and it could make us physically sick.

But if you can trust your mother, then let her try and see how it goes.

Thanx guys you are all brilliant,
Indigo you are right Dd3 surprises me too and I should let her go.
Marne, they live 40 minutes away but I woud still go if she wanted to come home, even in the night.
Mummytime, I do have this worry because she thinks she knows better than me over everything, not just my kids, I will try to make her promise thats a good idea. My friend suggeseted giving her something for in the car with a smell that she likes [genius], I am going to put the vic in her bag, for some reason she loves the smell of it so I thought if the car smell gets too much she can have a sniff of the vic, I too have smell issues so at least I can help with this anxiety.
Thanx again everyone.

I hope she enjoys it. Ds1 is just 8 in the past he got excited about staying at a friends house for one night but when it came to it he couldn't do it. Found out that as he had a limited diet he was worrying he wouldn't eat any tea and then be really hungry and then not like breakfast either! This is despite the fact that he was only eating plain pasta for tea and dry bread for breakfast so friend could have easily provided. However this year he went to spend a few days at his grannys house and really enjoyed it. He helped choose a menu that we sent in advance.

Yeah funnily enough we have just been talking aabout food, There's a few foody of things I need to tell GM about, she seems more confident about it today, we have talked about taking the vic in her bag with her nintendo DS for in the car.
She was talking about taking a water bottle for bedtime in case she is thirsty in the night. We have got a throat clearing stim and loads of echolalia going on this morning so she is definatly feeling stressed. We have had a games morning to give us plenty of time to chat.
I can't believe how stressful this is, I never felt like this with the other 2 Dd's.