Friends baby been diagnosed severe Cerabyl Palsy

[Kidstrack2]

My friend had an appointment today with specialists to find out what conditions had been caused by lack of oxygen at birth. The hospital has now admitted full responsibility stating the lack of clinical care caused her baby boy who is nearly 6m to have severe cerabyl palsy and is quadraplegic (Sp). He can hear and can focus a little but other than that he has a life expectancy till early teens. My friend is now saying she wished he had died in the early days to stop him suffering. I have no knowledge of these conditions and I don't know what to say to her either.

People with Cerebral Palsy can still have a very happy and enjoyable life. There is a lot of help for parents out there, and the main thing is that he is loved, and cared for.

That's very sad news . Is he developmentally impaired as well as physically?

so sorry

my daughter had lack of oxygen at birth and she is six now and they are only just starting to admit that yes it was caused by the birth. We have had to get a lawyer involved. i think your friend is most probably very angry, sad, depressed, feels worthless, feels guilty and a horrid mix of emotions. Just try to be there for her and be the best friend you possibly can. it must be so awful given a prognosis like that, as you can imagine, so just do the best you can

and remember too that dr's are sometimes wrong and at 6 months anything could happen

I met a lovely little boy who had severe CP at a special needs playgroup and he was the sweetest, most placid little darling you could meet.
My ds has ASD and as soon as he met him, he would sit and makes soothing noises to him when he was fitting.
You don't need to say anything to your friend, just let her know that you are there for anything she needs.

this may not be the case for you your friends little boy - but we we're told that dd would probly never walk and that she'd never have the required skills in life to get by.

She's now walking - with help and attends a mainstream nursery school we're she is doing excellent- i really hope things turn out for her xxx

Really sorry to hear your news. I think just try to be there for her as much as you can be, as Fio says.
I really appreciated the people who were able to give us practical help, like babysitting so that dh and I could have a wee break or making the effort to invite me out when I can't have been the best company. It really helps to have people to talk to, but practical help is just as good, if not better.

The sad thing is they requested a c-section 3times and the midwife said on the 3 occasions Its better for mother and baby to have a natural as possible birth as its a quicker recovery time. In some cases that may be true but certainly not in this one. Very early on in the labour the baby was distressed with grade 3 meconium etc yet they still made her labour 24hrs before finally paging a theartre team for an emergency c-section. To be honest you could tell from the start he was severly brain damaged. He also had two bleeds on the brain and has fits. His eyes roll to the back of his head and flutter about although at times he seems to focus but we are told his eyes are in spasm and he isn't focusing at all. He will be wheelchair bound with no physical mobility at all. Its just so sad to think it all could have been prevented. Mentally they don't hold any hope.

mmm, my cousin has the most severe CP i ever saw: took three years to learn to swallow, 7 to control hands to make back'forwrd BLISS board moves...she was said to have a life expectancy of 6months to two years. And is nearly 40 now.

Ambiguous to her, her family, her carers, her friends what her quality of life is all these years on: only nuggets to be drawn on a chat board are that - anything can happen re: prognosis in these situations as medical science is unrecognisable in this field now compared to 40 yrs ago. And FGS DO NOT neglect intellectual development in favour of maximising the physical as happened with my cuz: it was the fashion when she was a kid to try and improve the physical only - leaving her with not enough habits of learning, thinking, processing emotion to sustain a lifetime with a physical handicap. You are right, sadly, there wis suffering. I think the best thing you can do as a friend is be there if she needs you now, though in these early days everyone pitches in...and carry on being there practically and willingly year on year on year. Don't melt away...

I wish your friend all strength, and you much love. xx

Sone useful sites?

Basic Info
Scope - main charity for CP
Another parents forum

xx

Fairydust this was what we held on to when he was born that he would pull through and have a good quality of life or at least some. But after today its all fell flat. He died 3 times after he was born, in the neonatal unit/special care. My friends mum has been a good support to her, but at times my friend feels her mum is just to much to take at times, for instance after today her mums reply was why don't you just foster or adopt to bring the baby on! I wonder sometimes what planet her mother is on at times!

Thanks for those link merryberry, will pass them on to my friend, think it may well help her understand a bit more.

I work with adults (18+) who have learning disabilities, some with severe cerebral palsy. Everyone can enjoy life and have a fantastic time if you work within your abilities.
My ds has developmental difficulties but we have not had any diagnosis as yet (he's 2.4yrs - too young).
One thing I do know is the emotional stress you can go through when your child is different and how your expectations of having a "normal" (whatever the hell that is) child have not been met.
Sounds like your friend has a lot of emotions and serious stuff coming her way but she'll get there. It's a new way to live and you really do appreciate the small things in life which unless you're tuned in, can so easily be missed.
Wishing your friend all the best and her little one.