How to cope when your child doesn't fit a label/doesn't have a dx

[Blossomhill]

I am fine one minute and the next I am not.

Just feel that language disorder doesn't describe dd's (she is 6) difficulties enough or very well tbh. She has far more difficulties than language, even though it is the language that is causing it.

Just wondered how others in this situation feel. If you are anything like me in limbo!

dont know as time goes on I have just accepted that some things are out of my control and sometimes there never is a label or a cause. You just muddle along and accept what is and what will be. the hardest part is explaining to people that actually dd doesnt have x,y and z and apart from a list of difficulties etc that is all we have to describe her.

Try not to stress bloosmhill, she is who she is and some things are always left unanswered. We cannot control alot of things in life and unlucky this is one of those things xx

Well said Fio.

Blossom I was where you are now a couple of years ago...you know how hard I have fought to get J a dx but at the end of the day I am still not 100% about his dx.

Over the years J has been dx with selective mutism, then delayed speech & expressive language disorder, then came Semantic Pragmatic Disorder, then ADHD, then they said not ADHD but ADD!!!, significant learning difficulties came next, then the proffessionals threw in Dyspraxia and Dyslexia.......finally we got the DX of Autism BUT even now I am in a muddle.

J cant be dx with HFA due to his learning disabilities but he cant be dx with Aspergers because of his delayed speech.....so the CP Dx Autism, but he doesnt quite fit all the tick boxes for Autism???

He has significant problems with socialisation, he has no imaginative play skills but he has a more developed theory of mind than you would expect to see in a child with a Dx of Autism, he has so many sensory problems, he is back to smearing ATM....I could go on!!!

At the end of the day I dont think I will ever get a true DX because some children do present as being rather complex.

Just enjoy your daughter for all the wonderful things she can do....its the only way you can stop youurself from fretting so much.

Whats a label anyway?....I never thought I would say that because I was always the one who insisted that children needed to be DX so they can access all that they need....but sometimes all they need is understanding, patience and lots of love because there simply just isnt a label to fit.

Take care of yourself....you know where I am.

Thanks Fio and jayzmummy xxxxxx

It was just we had such a lovely holiday and the past 2 days dd has been the child from hell (awful i know but true) and sometimes I just don't think I am strong enough to deal with it all. Again pathetic but true

I know a dx is only a sign post but sometimes it's just nice to think oh she does that because of that. rather than thinking is that impulsiveness down to Adhd or AS. Am I making sense?

sometimes when everything is so hard of course you try and find answers. It is getting towards the end of a very long holiday and believe me i think ALL of us on here with school age children with special needs feel slightly off kilter and stressed and depressed and bloody knackered! That is most probably why it is affecting you more than it would usually, ikywm