I don't want to have another hour like today. Advice please.

[5inthebed]

DS2 (autism, dyspraxia) cut his thumb today by trapping it in the baby gate. It was bleeding slightly and he got absolutely hysterical. He wouldn't let me near him, he was flapping his hands causing the blood to fly everywhere and he was jumping up and down. He was also making autistic noises which he hasn't done for ages.

Nothing I said or did was calming him down. This went on for nearly an hour until DH got in from work and basically had to pin him down while I cleaned him up and put a plaster on his thumb. It wasn't even a big cut!

The past two times he has fallen over he has managed to pop his nose, and the sight of blood has, I think, given him panic attacks. So now every time he hurts himself (which happens on a regular basis) he panics about blood and gets hysterical.

Usually I can calm him down, but tonight was really hard, especially when DS1 was laughing at him and DS3 was crying because DS2 was.

Any suggestions on how to help him deal with this?

The only thing I can think of would be a social story..

Something along the lines of explaining that when you cut yourself .. The blood comes into the cut to help plug the gap. Blood is a very clever thing.
If I cut myself the red of the blood reminds me to let a grown up, put a plaster on my cut.
??
Something like that.

Ds2 hated blood until we explained how super duper clever it was..

I honestly don't think he would understand that. He i only 4 (5 next month) and his learning is like a 3 year old.

Maybe a social story with the plaster might be a good idea though. We used a social story succesfully about yelling in the middle of the night just to tell me he was going to the toilet.

I second the social story idea, definitely worth a shot.
I can imagine how drained you felt after this episode -my dd1 is the same about blood.

She also totally freaks when she hurts herself. I remember her falling over a couple of months ago and she screamed and shouted out of all proportion to the injury. That's a normal reaction for her, to be honest.

Another idea might be to have a kind of visual 'contract' for everyone to follow when your ds is upset or having a meltdown. That could involve 'no audience' so your older ds would know to walk away or leave the room.
Easier said than done, I know. Sometimes dd2 is transfixed by dd1 in the throes of a meltdown and this really irritates dd1.

slow exposure start with the social stories like Arsenic said, then explain how ds wont be at risk with a cut, then start to show pictures of cuts and if you cut yourself show ds at every opportunity and say 'look its fine' and have nice plasters and treats ready for next time say what a clever big boy ds is....lots of dc and adults have blood phobia.

if ds has anxiety wait for it to come down at each stage before moving on.

Oh we had Ice Age plasters, he chose them himself as he is very accident prone. He can fall over ite dramatically even when standing still .

SR, he was totally out of proportion to the cut. I was so drained after it, and no wine in the house. DS1 is usually really good with his brother and is used to his meltdowns, I think it was more a nervous laugh than anything else. DS3 is only 19 mo so a bit more tricky to remove him from the room.

I have PECS I use when he is in meltdown, might need to call his EP to see if she has any that might work when he is bleeding again.

It's so bloody hard at times dreading the 6 weeks holidays.

I know -it feels like constant fire fighting at times doesn't it? Sometimes I feel like my head's spinning with all of the issues we are dealing with.

Will you manage to get any breaks over the summer holidays?

Yes thankfully. DS2 has 6 hours a week respite where he goes to a lovely lady's house and I can do "normal" things with the other two.

We are moving shortly as well, so more stress. We are trying to get DS2 used to the idea of a new house, he keeps asking if we are taking his bed and his curtains. He wants to leave DS3 here though

Sorry, but am at his wanting to leave his brother behind.
I'm glad you get some respite, otherwise it would be a loooong 6 weeks! I think I will be completely grey by September.

Oh don't worry, I laugh at him as well. He shuts his brother in the cupboard at times out the way.

I was grey after the 7 weeks they had off last year, didn't have respite then, and so desperately needed it.