please help and advise me as quick a you are able

[anniebear]

firstly apologies for asking for advice as I have not posted for a long time, been on Mumsnet, mainly SN section for years but havent posted for a while but do browse regualry, just never feel like I can be of help.

DD goes to a SN school but they pay a 1-1 to go to mainstream with her 4 afternoons a week, has always gone well, although she is so far behind them they have struggled to fit her in at times. DD also has a twin sister who attends the mainstream school, sometimes DD twin1 goes into year 4 with her sister but quite a lot accessed year 2. She is very behind, suppose has severe learning disability but is able to learn, is starting to form letters, starting to read and is doing well, she is horrendous for me, is fantastic at school, everyone loves her and is no trouble.

Her fab 1-1 at mainstream loves her to bits and is great with her, she was quite happy for me to drop DD to 3 afternoons in sep as I do realise DD will go to SN school fulltime in yr 7 so I thought I would drop an afternoon now as she goes into yr 5 in Sep. Told SN school this, they had a word with mainstream, who rang back and said "we can only accomodate DD on a friday afteroon cme sep"

thats it...havent rung us, not told us their is any probs. feel like a brick has been thrown at me. Plus so rude as they break up a week wed!!!! And they tell us now!

The probem is I imagine is fitting DD in anywhere with her being so behind, but why cant they if others can do it? Its a tight knitted community church school and I think they are being awful when DD has been attending part time with a 1-1 provided by the SN school since she was 4 (nearly 9 now)

She doesnt cost them a penny, 1-1 does the work for her, Senco has nothing to do with her..she is fantastically behaved, the kids love her, the parents love her,were is the problem?

Rung and made an appointment for thurs 9am. Not sure what to say, do I have any say in it really or can they just say they cant accomodate her

I am really annoyed
Help!

sorry its so long

oh no that sounds aweful! I dont know whether you actually have a say but do go in and fight her corner. write down notes about the points you want to make so you dont leave the meeting thinking 'oh no I should have said x'

hope you work this out

thank you . I like her going to mainstream also as she is very sociable and I think it does her really good and she loves going

grrrrrr

I feel sick thinking about going in on Thursday

aww don't feel too worried, try to kep it together and prepare as much as you can. did they give you any reasons she cant go?

they havent even told me, they rung and told the head of the SN school who rang me!!!

It will be because she is so far behind, they will say how can she learn, who will she work with ect ect

which I fully understand, which is why I have dropped a session.

But she can do PE with them with her 1-1's support and has been doing, she can join in play time, art etc, currently reads with a little girl who will be going onto yr 3, why cant that continue? I dont mind her doing some stuff on her own with her 1-1 as long as she gets to spend time with the others children also

then you need to write down sme goos solid reasons about why she NEEDS to continue er sessions and be prepared to argue about thm...extrastress you just dn't need

not at the moment anyway, struggling loads with dd's behaviour and her bashing her head on the wall, so tired and want to be strong and not cry at this meeting!!

thank you for your support xx

you'll be ok, just remember iot's only a meeting, and you know best, try to think positive xx

I don't have any useful advice but will bump this thread up in case anyone else knows.

Wishing you the very best of luck with the meeting.

Welcome back btw.

what does it say on her statement about the split placement, would have thought if you have a split placement named, there should be a lot more to changing the arrangement than a phonecall. It's not just about the level she is working at, it's about what she gets from the socialising and being part of the community when she is in the ms school. I'd tackle it from that angle. I think there are a couple of us with meetings thursday, will keep fingers crossed for you too

Hiya CT, havent been away really, just havent felt able to give any advice, always have a nosey though, how are you ?

I don't think it will say about a split statement to be honest, She had a full time place in SN school and we said we wanted her to be able to go with her twin sister to mainstream and at first she only went one afternoon, which we increased to 2 days a week, but the 1-1 all funded by the SN school, they actually took some one on to go to Mainstream with DD,

Mainstream have not had to do anything really!!

thank you for the advice and support. Not sure when I said as quick a poss in my title lol, when the meeting is Thursday !!!

thanks everyone

Are they allowedto expel a child from the majority of school for being disabled when that child's needs are fully met by the one to one carer? I'#m fairly sure there are laws against that ie the disability dicrimination act!

Is your dd easily influenced by others around her? If she is, behaviour-wise, could you perhaps make a case centred on that?

How about writing to school and asking them what their objections are? Perhaps when they have to put it in writing, they might think again?

Don't know Colditz

Kymso, I am going in on Thursday morning, so I will be asking them this

I know they will say they don't feel she can fit in anywhere, (but not in those words) no class is suitable as she is so far behind with her learning

But her 1-1 thinks it is ok, DD loves going, 1-1 does everything with her anyway, doesnt have a break, so is with DD 100% of the time.

Thank you

Her twin sis just said "you hardly even know she is there" meaning she isnt in the way and not noisy

My DD is good as gold in both schools, no trouble at all and everyone loves her

Grrrrrr still so annoyed

got to be careful as my other DD still has 2 years there but I really want to get across hpow out of order they are doing this a week before and not meeting with us to discuss it

Oh Anniebear! How very upsetting!

You will not know what the reasoning for saying they can only accommodate dt2 on Fridays till you see them. It could be something completely impersonal such as some rule that is the issue, ie the number of children in school if it is full (and dt2 not on the school roll) - or the insurance cover!
Can the sn school help? might be worth a meeting there as well in case they can help work out what is best for dt2.

I get upset at meetings too. We did not get a split placement for ds, but interacting with all children (ms) is so important! Fortunatly he has kept up contact with the village children through cubs and afterschool club.

Sending a bracing hug!!

Its none of those reasons Magso, it will literally be because of how far behind she is and her not being able to do the work they do and thye are going into year 5

SN school is fab, but the Head told me what mainstream had said and that I now have to make an appointment to go and see mainstream, that was it, although I was in a shopping centre at the time!!!

Thank you

Oh Annie! Feel for you- I was devastated too!
Ds is in year 5 (sn just starting to recognise a few words) and they do seem to work much more intensly than in lower juniors, so I can see there may be positives in reducing the ms element, but dropping to only one session ---.
I do hope you can get what is truely best for dd!!

thanks Magso, I was dropping it to 3 afternoons a week, her 1-1 thought that was fine, she thinks its going well!!!

And I know I will be dropping it to 2 at some point untill yr 7 when she will go fulltime SN, but for now just would have liked to have her do 3 afternoons in her local school, with her twin sister and joining in the best she can

Hope meeting went OK today.

how did it go?