Helping me this screaming problem pllleaaasee

[lisad123isgoingcrazy]

Ok DD2 is 2.10years, and is "more than likely on the autisic specrum". She ahs some speech regression, has echolalia and other stuff going on.
At the moment we are getting alot of screaming and shouting. If you dont answer her in the way she thinks you should, she shouts, if she cant make herself understood she screams. We are also getting loads of hitting (hit her sister with broom this weekend, around the head) and tbh she just thinks its funny, doesnt care at all.

Im hoping someone here might have some tips. Shes hard to engage in play and she'll much rather sit on sofa watching tv than read a book or do a puzzle with me
We do use time out which worked ok with dd1, but DD2 just doesnt respond at all.
Her reception langauage is delayed so not sure how much she understands what i say either.
TIA

I saw, should have just added to that. Its stupid I used to spend my days advising parents about how to manage behaviour ect, but cant seem to get a good grip on DD2

sent you a CAT

Lisa firstly don't feel bad- I know its ahrd, I went from homestart organiser with all teh asnwers to carer and confused mess overnight! It isn;t easy.

You need to work out what's going on here: is it feedback (reaction) she's after, anxiety is she doesn't get same answer every time, is it the alck of empathy or social understanding? It can be ahrd to break down.

I would suggest a book on functional behavbiour analysis as that did help with ds1 in particular who was like this; still is really, bit less screaming I guewss (but enver fear- ds3 has started with the screaming! We couldn't have silence right, that would never do )

AS a start I would begin with developing stock answers to questions: when ds3 asks how long untol we always answer in teh same way 9'it will be x minues') or similar; the minimum variation may be enough to reduce stress levels. Also if some questions get repeated see if you cn come up with a viisual or even recorded aid to help- I could see a real value for example in giving ds3 a teddy ebar with a recorded message saying 'we are going home now' for shopping trips so he could squeeze it as many times as he needs.

Also, wrt to hitting etc, do look at salycylates and social stories can be amde very simply to start now.

And I know its a PITA but pop the broom etc in a locked cupboard for now: i;ve xperienced the results of not doing that sadly, ds3's asd may be in part related to a head injury caused by ds1. We have ntohing in the house that can be used to hit and yet they still find things- it's a compelte PITA

I have exactly the same problem with my son...we have tried loads...planned ignoring (which didnt work at all) time outs, emotion cards, engaging in pla with one other child (as too many children aggrivate him) sparkling moments (lots of praise for the positives) giving him firm boundaries (not much ree choice at al he cat handle it) and not getting him to explain what he's done as he doesnt respond, now we just say 'you did x, it made x sad and you know it was the wrong thing to do'

all said and done though...I still wanna scream and cry at the end of most days

oh also if she likes books there are some fantastic behaviour books out there for you to share with her!

'hands are not for hitting'
'feet are not for kicking'
'teeth are not for biting'
the berenstein bears books are good too.