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SEN

Here you'll find advice from parents and teachers on special needs education.

Choosing the right school setting for my autistic dyslexic daughter

11 replies

bluemagicpenguin · 14/08/2026 20:56

Hi

My daughter is 8 and going into year 4. She is dyslexic, autistic and most probably has ADHD and has EBSNA (attendance around 37% last year). She is very high masking and can flip between running around to being frozen with anxiety.

We are currently going through the EHCP assessment and I'm looking at schools and trying to figure out the right setting for her. Her current school cannot meet her need, they support the EHCP and haven't officially said that yet but we had to do a parental EHCP application and they have caused trauma by not only not meeting her needs but also doing the exact things that cause her to be anxious and deregulated.

We sent all her paperwork to Burlington House before term ended and they said no that her needs required more 1-1 adult support which they could not meet. Was disappointed. We haven't sent our paperwork to Abingdon House yet but also they can't offer a trial unless the LA has consulted with them. I'm assuming it might be a battle to get the LAs to consult an independent school?

The EHCP is due to be completed mid/end September, do I need to prepare myself that we may have months of trying to find the right school?

She still is unable to read (was unable attend English or Maths for the whole of year 3), her learning gap is so wide I'm not convinced a mainstream school will be able to manage her level of dyslexia and that she will be able to access a mainstream classroom when her anxiety around her dyslexia and struggling within the classroom is so high she cannot go in at all!

She is high functioning incredible social, chatterbox and I believe in the right environment she will thrive. Her happy place is the stables and she is able to go on her own for pony days with no issues, listen and communicate.

We are in South London.

Any experience of the Cavendish group?
Anyone with a child with a similar profile, what setting worked for your child.

Thank you

OP posts:
inthequietofdawn · 14/08/2026 21:41

Looking at the evidence will help you begin to understand the placement required. When you say you currently going through the EHCNA, has all the necessary evidence already been sought? Do you have copies of the reports from EP (and hopefully at least SALT and OT)?

Have you had the draft yet?

Have you visited any schools yet? That will enable you to ask questions and observe their cohort to help you think about what will work and what won’t.

It doesn’t sound like MS will be suitable even with an EHCP.

If you are within travelling distance, have you considered Moon Hall, or do they think DD’s needs are too great for them?

Depending where you are in South London, you might want to look at Birtley House not that far into Kent.

Do you need a SpLD specialist school or would a (carefully selected) ASD school work? If an ASD school would work and just over the border into Surrey is within travelling distance, you could look at Ashley Park. Some of their DC also have dyslexia.

When the LA finalise the EHCP, if there is to be a type of placement and placement named in section I, that should happen. It shouldn’t happen months later.

You have a right to request certain schools such as maintained schools, academy schools, non-maintained independent schools and section 41 independent schools. If any of these are your preference, the LA should consult. This isn’t the same for wholly independent schools. You still have the right to ask for it and put your case across, but sometimes LAs won’t consult. If you later appeal and the LA won’t consult, you can ask SENDIST to direct them to consult.

The Cavendish group has a mixed reputation. Although Burlington House and Abingdon House don’t admit where SEMH needs are the primary need, some DC find the behaviour of other pupils when they are dysregulated too overwhelming.

bluemagicpenguin · 14/08/2026 23:30

inthequietofdawn · 14/08/2026 21:41

Looking at the evidence will help you begin to understand the placement required. When you say you currently going through the EHCNA, has all the necessary evidence already been sought? Do you have copies of the reports from EP (and hopefully at least SALT and OT)?

Have you had the draft yet?

Have you visited any schools yet? That will enable you to ask questions and observe their cohort to help you think about what will work and what won’t.

It doesn’t sound like MS will be suitable even with an EHCP.

If you are within travelling distance, have you considered Moon Hall, or do they think DD’s needs are too great for them?

Depending where you are in South London, you might want to look at Birtley House not that far into Kent.

Do you need a SpLD specialist school or would a (carefully selected) ASD school work? If an ASD school would work and just over the border into Surrey is within travelling distance, you could look at Ashley Park. Some of their DC also have dyslexia.

When the LA finalise the EHCP, if there is to be a type of placement and placement named in section I, that should happen. It shouldn’t happen months later.

You have a right to request certain schools such as maintained schools, academy schools, non-maintained independent schools and section 41 independent schools. If any of these are your preference, the LA should consult. This isn’t the same for wholly independent schools. You still have the right to ask for it and put your case across, but sometimes LAs won’t consult. If you later appeal and the LA won’t consult, you can ask SENDIST to direct them to consult.

The Cavendish group has a mixed reputation. Although Burlington House and Abingdon House don’t admit where SEMH needs are the primary need, some DC find the behaviour of other pupils when they are dysregulated too overwhelming.

Thank you for your reply. We have EP, OT reports, diagnosis letters (provisional for ADHD). My application was very detailed and also contained reports from other professional that work with my child and CAMHS letter. Currently in the assessment period gathering evidence stage although a further EP report wont happen until we are back at school. I have visited a couple of local MS schools that have a resource base but as there is not dyslexia specialism or leaning I'm not sure they are quite right. Her behaviour does not affect other pupils as she withdraws when anxious and masks which is why she has not been supported. I feel a SpLD specialist school that understands autism would be best.

Her current school has had such a huge amount of staff changes and are very inconsistent with timetables and intervention and this is what probably causes the most amount of dysregulation and caused heightened anxiety, a setting with smaller classes, more stable with staff and consistent with timetable and can support transitions with a dyslexic focus so she doesn't feel different would be ideal.

The schools you have mentioned look interesting but we are quite central so I think they may all be to far. I'm worried we wont find the right setting in time for draft EHCP.

OP posts:
inthequietofdawn · 15/08/2026 12:01

A special school won’t necessarily have a more stable staff base. Some SS have a higher turnover than many MS.

If you are more central, you could look at Fairley House. However, I suspect they will decline.

The LA may be in breach of the timescales if you are still yet to have assessments. There are some exceptions to the timescales, one of which is related to when the LA asked the school for advice and information. Do you know when that happened? And what week are you on?

Is the current EP report insufficient for the EHCNA? If you, the LA and report writer agree it is sufficient, the LA shouldn’t seek another assessment. Unfortunately, LAs often say it isn’t even when it is so they can seek their own less detailed version.

What about SALT?

Is the CAMHS letter written for the EHCP process? If not, you might want to ask the LA to seek advice and information from a clinical psychologist &/or psychiatrist. This is because more general CAMHS letters often don’t cover needs, provision and outcomes, and they mostly aren’t detailed, specified and quantified.

bluemagicpenguin · 15/08/2026 18:17

inthequietofdawn · 15/08/2026 12:01

A special school won’t necessarily have a more stable staff base. Some SS have a higher turnover than many MS.

If you are more central, you could look at Fairley House. However, I suspect they will decline.

The LA may be in breach of the timescales if you are still yet to have assessments. There are some exceptions to the timescales, one of which is related to when the LA asked the school for advice and information. Do you know when that happened? And what week are you on?

Is the current EP report insufficient for the EHCNA? If you, the LA and report writer agree it is sufficient, the LA shouldn’t seek another assessment. Unfortunately, LAs often say it isn’t even when it is so they can seek their own less detailed version.

What about SALT?

Is the CAMHS letter written for the EHCP process? If not, you might want to ask the LA to seek advice and information from a clinical psychologist &/or psychiatrist. This is because more general CAMHS letters often don’t cover needs, provision and outcomes, and they mostly aren’t detailed, specified and quantified.

I know there is no guarantee on staff changes its more that she has 5 different teacher changes in year 1 & 2 which has a detrimental effect on her.

The timescale is ok, EP report was done last April and it would benefit from being updated as her needs have grown considerably since then. I am waiting for her EP to return from holiday to see if we can get her report updated. The EP is from a neighbouring LA (where her school is ) she is a trainee and I've think it is worth getting ours updated or possible a new one as from what I have heard this EP reports are a but basic. I may ask the LA (have struck up a good relationship with the guy who the applications all go through and he manages the requests, if they could use one of theirs.

Also wondering if we need a more detailed dyslexia assessment

Haven't had SALT - Should the LA do that or do we need to go private?

I think we are week 3 1/2.

CAMHS letter was evidence that her anxiety and EBSNA was due to needs needed supporting. She was then closed off to CAMHS but is still under CAMHS fro her ADHD assessment which has a 2 year wait so hopefully next year. Community paediatrician gave her a provisional diagnosis due to school questionnaire being so different and them not recognising her needs. She has just become open to CAMHS again as they have now referred her to a CUE's course.

LA have contacted school and their input is pretty basic, just referred our reports and listed interventions and that they have had little impact and they support our application. We didnt have a SENCO for most of the school year so its been a shit show!

Thank you

OP posts:
inthequietofdawn · 15/08/2026 19:32

If you are only at week 3.5, it is highly unlikely the EHCP will be completed/finalised by mid/end September. It is uncommon for LAs to finalise before they have to.

During the EHCNA, the LA must seek advice and information from:
a) the child’s parent or the young person;
b) educational advice (usually from the headteacher or principal);
c) medical advice and information from a health care professional;
d) psychological advice and information from an educational psychologist;
e) advice and information in relation to social care;
f) advice and information from any other person the local authority thinks appropriate;
g) where the child or young person is in or beyond year 9, advice and information in relation to provision to assist the child or young person in preparation for adulthood and independent living; and
h) advice and information from any person the child’s parent or young person reasonably requests that the local authority seek advice from.

H can include SALT. If you haven’t already requested the LA approach SALT, do that now.

Under H, I would also request the LA seeks advice from a clinical psychologist &/or psychiatrist. This is because while the evidence you have from CAMHS should be considered, it doesn’t sound like it sufficiently covers the provision DD requires, which is very common for normal CAMHS letters.

A good EP report will cover needs and provision related to dyslexia.

inthequietofdawn · 15/08/2026 19:43

Actually, when I say “If you haven’t already requested the LA approach SALT, do that now.” I assumed the LA had already agreed to assess as that is how your OP reads, but if you are only at week 3.5 that may not be the case. Only ask the LA to seek advice and information from SALT if they have agreed to assess.

bluemagicpenguin · 15/08/2026 23:23

Hi Thank you for all your advice. Yes they have agreed to access from my parental application. I wasn't expecting a yes straight away! I will speak to the case worker next week re SALT & clinical psychologist &/or psychiatrist.

Thank you again.

OP posts:
inthequietofdawn · 16/08/2026 11:12

Make the request in writing so you have a paper trail as evidence in case you need it. On their website, IPSEA has a model letter you can use to request the LA seeks the advice.

bluemagicpenguin · 19/08/2026 10:41

Thank you but doesn’t seem to cover London

OP posts:
TheSquareMile · 19/08/2026 12:50

@bluemagicpenguin

Will Limpsfield Grange be a possibility for her when she is older, OP?

https://limpsfieldgrange.co.uk/

Updated Home Page - Limpsfield Grange School

https://limpsfieldgrange.co.uk

bluemagicpenguin · 19/08/2026 12:57

TheSquareMile · 19/08/2026 12:50

@bluemagicpenguin

Will Limpsfield Grange be a possibility for her when she is older, OP?

https://limpsfieldgrange.co.uk/

Thank you, will keep that in mind for later on it looks good

OP posts:
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