My 11yo old son was diagnosed with Autism and ADHD about 2 years ago after years of behaviours. Started in nursery when he was two, he was ticking from around 18 months old. The nursery insinuated ASD at around 2.5 years old. He was eventually referred at about 7 years old to CAHMS, but I actually thought this was for tourettes. He has had dozens of unofficial exclusions and half a dozen official. He soiled himself, had a speech delay, he had no friendships, wouldn't engage in work, wasnt at age and stage landmarks. Regularly up in the night, wetting and soiling. He has gone through stages of having whole body ticks, ticks where he bites his mouth to the point of bleeding, clearing his throat, blinking, moving his mouth, grimacing...then for a while these will subside to finger movements or mouth movements that a lot of people might not notice.
After his diagnosis, I can only really describe it as a radical acceptance. School was more accommodating, I was more accepting, and we are now almost inseparable, he is just the best. I had to leave two jobs to fit around him, I have a very flexible, mainly WFH job that works well for us.
He is now managing to keep a couple of friendships (still with input from me), he is participating in some school work, he is a great talker, as long as I prompt and get things ready he is able to shower and brush his teeth. He doesn't run off into the road now, he'll still wonder if we're in the supermarket or eating out for example, but I'm not as worried now.
Is this 'normal' ? Can there be fluctuations? I have always tried to do everything right, after my relationship broke down and got a masters degree so I could provide for us (i have two children), I bought a house (cheap, and we are totally isolated, but on a very busy road, which Is causing issues but thats another story), but I feel like I'm trouble?