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SEN

Here you'll find advice from parents and teachers on special needs education.

Child with suspected ASD very upset after my haircut

5 replies

GreenCaterpillarOnALeaf · 27/04/2026 09:11

Please help!! My DS who’s just turned 5 has suspected ASD (after this it’s not really suspected anymore) and yesterday I got a haircut. Not a massive change (in my opinion anyway) and he just freaked. It’s not like I can stick my hair back on, but I wish I could. Initially thought I’d leave it and he would clam down but he’s still being funny.

Honestly it didn’t occur to me he would be this upset, he gets upset with routine changes but nothing like this. We have also moved house recently so maybe I should have thought about it more. I feel fucking horrible. I haven’t had my hair professionally cut since he’s been alive, I’ve just trimmed it myself so yesterday I had probably about 3/4 inches off and it’s had a bit more shape. Idk if this is relevant but he doesn’t like when I straighten my hair but it never gets this kind of reaction.

Has anyone had a similar situation? He’s at school today and I had to explain to his teacher at breakfast club “oh he’s struggling today because I cut my hair” and I felt like a mug.

OP posts:
Oddlyfull · 27/04/2026 09:16

Honestly, and I speak from experience, I would play this very cool.

Yep, you’re not happy. I get that. It will grow back, chill. Now…. Ice cream? Fancy going to the park?

GreenCaterpillarOnALeaf · 27/04/2026 09:21

Oddlyfull · 27/04/2026 09:16

Honestly, and I speak from experience, I would play this very cool.

Yep, you’re not happy. I get that. It will grow back, chill. Now…. Ice cream? Fancy going to the park?

I’m glad it’s a common experience that does make me feel better

OP posts:
24Dogcuddler · 27/04/2026 22:25

I changed jobs ( teacher, different school) when our younger DD was age 4 1/2 (autism diagnosis) and she wouldn’t have anything to do with me for around 3 weeks.
It was as if I was a different person. She only wanted Dad to do things for her.
We kind of played it down even though it was very upsetting and she just suddenly started wanting me again.
Try not to react too much. Sometimes colours or styles of hair can really matter whilst others might not even notice.

GreenCaterpillarOnALeaf · 27/04/2026 22:41

24Dogcuddler · 27/04/2026 22:25

I changed jobs ( teacher, different school) when our younger DD was age 4 1/2 (autism diagnosis) and she wouldn’t have anything to do with me for around 3 weeks.
It was as if I was a different person. She only wanted Dad to do things for her.
We kind of played it down even though it was very upsetting and she just suddenly started wanting me again.
Try not to react too much. Sometimes colours or styles of hair can really matter whilst others might not even notice.

I’ve been kind of being nonchalant all day and he did let me help sort him out for bed so progress from yesterday. On the plus side I’ve got a good solid example of his ridged behaviour for when he has his assessment…

OP posts:
christmasoverwhelm · 28/04/2026 07:41

My dc was like this when I got my glasses (which I only wear for reading!). It came and went thankfully

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