Nursery with my nonverbal child

[ThisChirpyUser]

My 3 year old boy 4 in April is non verbal waiting on speech and language. He attends nursery goes 3 half days a week. I do over think at times that he is not ok but he can communicate through pointing and pulling you. I have had the odd problem at nursery such as him wetting him self which is something he has never done since starting on the toilet 9 months ago but this was put down to the new toys outside and he was excited.
Anyway I have noticed he is rarely in the photos they put on there website the other day on Red nose day he was dressed in all red tracksuit when I have looked on the 44 photos they've put on there website he isn't on 1 photo not even in the background. There are photos of children who aren't even dressed in red. I know he doesn't sit down and do the activities much (drawing etc)
Also I have just moved and am wanting to keep him in this nursery due to him moving to big school in September I didn't want 2 changes for him in such a short gap but I am worried they aren't meeting his needs anyway 😔

The photo thing wouldn't bother me.

when did he move into the early years room?

my son started showing struggles in the early years room before leaving for school.
does he wear ear defenders? Would a chewy help?

have nursery addressed anything?

I would speak to them. There may be a simple explanation, such as DS not liking his photograph taken.

Separately, I would request a meeting to discuss SEN provision. Does DS have an EHCP? If not, has an EHCNA been requested? What outside agencies are involved?

No no EHCP or anything no-one seems to think there's anything to worry about just that he doesn't talk he doesn't wear ear defenders usually fine with noises loves the music loud and bikes he covers his early only when going in public toilets with the hand dryers and just the speech and language we've been waiting 2 year just got his telephone appointment for next week

His dad has ADHD just never had any tests for it my little boy said mum and dad at around 1 but then hasn't said anything since just eeeee ooooo I can see he is trying more since me having another baby last year

He started nursery September 2024 in 2 year old room and moved up to the 3-4s in the July after he turned 3 in April

You can request an EHCNA yourself. On their website, IPSEA has a model letter you can use.

Request a meeting with the nursery. They should be supporting DS’s additional needs. If they need advice they should be asking outside agencies such as the Area SENCO and, if your LA still has them, the specialist teaching service. If they need more funding they should be applying for early years inclusion funding.

I would also speak to the GP &/or HV about DS’s development.

Mine is not quite non verbal but very limited. He refused to have his school photo done as it is a school nursery. They tried twice so yours might have done the same? The only thing that bothers me is all the children come out with cards for Christmas, Easter or Mothering Sunday whereas I get absolutely nothing. It is a bit upsetting.

He's started saying yeah last week or so but is really loud at times and shouts any time his little sister is saying the odd word, he wasn't in for picture day but he again does sometimes shout if i ask him to say cheese but i feel they should be taking extra photos as he can't tell me what he's been doing. Aw bless I'm the same with that too they come out with the odd card and said he's tried but when I say aww look thank you etc he doesn't like it🙈

Yes they should give us extra feedback because the kids can't tell us what they have been doing. The nursery my child is at I suspect if the child isn't doing the card themselves they won't bother otherwise to do one or any other artwork!

Nursery teacher here with an SEN child. It was upsetting for me as my son never appeared in nursery pics. When I asked them they said he never looked happy in the pics 😭 I countered that was just the way he looked (never smiles on cue) and that is still appreciate seeing what he was doing. He was later diagnosed with autism.
In terms of your son, at nearly 4 and not using any spoken language this really should be ringing alarm bells with staff. I teach 1 non verbal, entirely self led autistic child that now has an EHCP and will go to special school in September. To be fair he is rarely in pics as he doesn't join in with any group activities ordering to go to a quiet space outside of the nursery room. I also teach 2 others with SEN funding that use just a few single words. These children join in and play with others but just can't speak. I don't think they are autistic but have severe speech delays. I'm gathering evidence for EHCP for them. When assessed they are approx 8-12 months developmentally for language which is a 75% delay.
Have the introduced visuals, makaton, pecs or AAC to help him communicate?

@Pigriver Curious how you don't think they are autistic? Being that non verbal at four or nearly four is a big red flag for autism surely? Are they selective mute or not able to talk?