Benefit of diagnosis?

[NOS27]

My DS is in Reception, academically able but school seem to be dropping hints about ASD. He was expected for everything at the end of nursery including Persona, Social and Emotional Development. When asked, they say he has friends who he likes and who he seeks out to play when he wishes. He can play imaginatively and reciprocally with them but often chooses to play on his own and has some repetitive behaviours, choosing to dance etc.

They have asked us to seek a speech assessment as they feel his speech can sometimes be unclear. At home we haven’t noticed this and he speaks well, in clear cohesive sentences and shows age appropriate understanding on screening tools. I have said we will seek a private speech assessment but in terms of ASD, I’m wondering if there is any benefit to seeing a diagnosis for a child who to all intents and purposes needs no extra support, has friends etc. As a first time Mum, I’m just concerned that I may be missing something by saying we don’t want to explore a diagnosis so would love opinions from anyone who has experience.

While most support is based on needs, there are some exceptions to that. For example, in some areas with ASD specialist teaching services, it is only for those with a formal diagnosis. Some ASD specialist schools require a formal diagnosis - even if that isn’t on your radar now, you don’t know what the future holds. Some groups/services require a formal diagnosis.

I think diagnosis is importantly for understanding yourself.

If the school is suggesting an assessment, I personally would listen.

You're thinking about your child as he is now, but in the blink of an eye he'll be year 5 and you may wish to have more options for schools/know more about his needs. Waiting lists are long. Nothing will happen quickly.

Practically, it's certainly easier to have an assessment done on a young child than on a grumpy teen who doesn't want to be "different".

From what you say he doesn't sound like he's showing any particularly unusual signs for a boy his age, but it's hard to say. Is he young in his year?

My daughter was referred for ASD assessment in primary school. At the end of reception, she got 'exceeding expectations' in all areas apart from 'imaginative play', where she got 'expected'. She broke apart when she had to transfer to an unsuitable secondary school and we had to take her out of school in the midst of a severe mental health crises and eating disorder. ASD can look very high achieving and 'normal'. My daughter e.g. struggles with group dynamics and communication in groups (an onlooker would only say she is either shy or a bit moody), but always had close friends and was literally flawless in the 11plus for English, vocabulary, reading, verbal reasoning etc. She started to speak just before she turned 7 months, big word phrases like 'want laptop' from the start, but had SALT for a lisp. What are school's specific worries? Repetitive play was our first clue. During nursery age, my daughter would often leave group play and start doing repetitive play, like filling and emptying a pot with water or mud in the mud kitchen, or even just going up and down a slide. She could spend hours on a drop slide. She also enjoyed counting up to 1000 as a 1 year old, and as a 3 year old wanted to wear the same princess dress at every 'Golden time'. She wanted to learn the violin at 3 and enjoyed playing scales and arpeggios, as it's very repetitive and a way of stimming. A lot of ASD behaviour can look 'normal' or even 'very desirable'. ASD doesn't have to interfere with a normal successful life, you can even have a very good social life, but I think it's important to know if one has it, as I think you'll need to adjust parenting and school support accordingly and it's important for an autistic person to be aware of and advocate for one's needs proudly. Given how long waiting times are, you have nothing to lose if school wants to refer. He might have his A levels by the time he got a diagnosis. My daughter has now been on the NHS waiting list for 7 years, she's almost finished her GCSEs now. We have seen many private psychiatrists, clinical psychologists and also our CAMHS team in the meantime, all agree she is autistic, but no 'official' NHS diagnosis yet.

Thank you for all your opinions, some really interesting points made!