Therapy for adhd

[Clearinguptheclutter]

My ds10 told me a couple of weeks ago that he has ADHD and after talking to him and researching I have concluded that he probably does have the hyperactive/impulsive type, and has been masking (extremely well) all this time

I have a meeting with school tomorrow to discuss but I’m not sure how productive this will be as he is extremely good at school academically (struggles a bit socially). Lets it all out at home.

anyway I’m unsure at this point about going down the diagnostic route as either a very long wait or extremely expensive and I am keen to explore other avenues other than medication

I’m at the very beginning of this steep learning curve. I’m wondering if any mnetters can tell me about any specific kind of (talking) therapy has helped their adhd kid.

also keen to know if any other mnetters have an adhd child who is the master/mistresss of masking. As I understand it girls are far better than boys at this generally.

and if anyone else has experience of a child diagnosing themselves! Somewhat shocked that he’s told me before I was able to figure it out myself.

Not talking therapy, which many ND DC struggle with, but OT and SALT can help. As can less direct forms of therapies, such as animal-assisted therapy or not therapy, but something like Mindjam. Coaching and mentoring can help too.

The ‘let’s it all out at home’ is known as the coke bottle effect. It signifies unmet needs at school. The school should be providing support, diagnosis or not, academically able or not.

While it is the stereotypical view that girls mask better than boys, some boys mask extremely well and some girls don’t. Don’t let the stereotypical view put you off.

Personally, whether you decide to go down the medication route or not, and DS/you may change your mind as he gets older, I think diagnosis is important.

Thank you very much for that response

sorry I wasn’t clear I didn’t mean “talking” therapy specifically, rather a non-medication type of therapy. Is a GP likely to be able to point me in the right direction. I am very lucky to be a position to pay for what he needs, but not sure what is best at this point

of course we’re open to going down the full dianogstic and medicated route in the future. As I gather things can get worse during puberty.

I am speaking to the school for the first time later today. I hope they’ll be supportive but I’m more concerned about the secondary school he’s set to join in September (place not confirmed yet). Do you know if secondary schools can support without an official diagnosis?

Support in schools is based on needs rather than diagnosis. The secondary school should still support DS without a diagnosis. Once you know where DS is going, speak to the SENCO.

Ah, I read your post as talking therapies as in things like CBT.

Whether the GP is helpful or not depends on the GP. Some are great and would be able to. Some are rubbish.

How did your meeting go OP? Well done for listening to your DS - he sounds very switched on!

Thanks for the response. Teacher very sympathetic (has autistic an adhd son) however can’t do anything unless struggling at school which he is not

she said to contact GP who referred me back to school- I stood my ground and they seem to want to refer me to adhd services but that will take ages at best and he needs help right now.

investigating options privately- there are some child psychologists nearby

he seems to be more worried about the fact that he may have adhd than the symptoms themselves. But won’t really talk to me properly. Is just constantly anxious at home. Lots of crying/lashing out

The school is wrong to say they can only help if DS is struggling at school. If the SENCO is refusing to provide support, go higher. Follow up the meeting with an email so you have a paper trail as evidence should you require it at a later date.

'he seems to be more worried about the fact that he may have adhd than the symptoms themselves. But won’t really talk to me properly. Is just constantly anxious at home. Lots of crying/lashing out'

I'd look for psychologist to work with you as well as your child, and support with anxiety first rather than assessing. Is he usually anxious and upset? What is he struggling with at home - how does his impulsivity and hyperactivity look like?

Thanks for this
yes this is the plan

he is pretty anxious about a lot of things. This is my main point of concern rather than adhd itself

luckily I’ve found out that he’s covered through my husband’s work private health insurance policy so going down that route for now

https://www.rcpsych.ac.uk/news-and-features/podcasts/detail/children's-mental-health-listen-up-adhd-in-children-and-young-people

@Clearinguptheclutter you might find this helpful

Psycoeducation is noted and my child's psychiatrist also said very important

Good luck