Urgent HELP

[ThatPositiveMum]

I am on holiday with my 3 year old autistic child and a 2 year old. She became feverish just before we left for holiday. On the day of the travel, she started throwing intense meltdown like we have never seen before. It got worse at the airport for no apparent reason. She has been screaming and very irritable at the slightest thing. My husband is making it worse as he has been screaming and hitting her against my will, saying she is stubborn. I'm not in my country. My daughter needs help and the supposed father is escalating the situation. I have a 2 year old here. Anyone ever had such intense tantrums from an autistic child? How can I calm the situation. She is throwing herself on the floor, throwing objects and screaming. I'm literally pinning her down to type this. Help!

Tantrum or meltdown? I would suggest the latter.

If DH is hitting DD, can you take DC away from him?

Many find meltdowns worsen when their DC is unwell. Holidays can be difficult for many DC with additional needs e.g. travel, people, busyness, noise, somewhere that isn’t home, different food, change in routine, transitions... So it isn’t surprising that DD is struggling when they are mixed together.

Is the temperature coming down with medication? Can DD communicate? Can you move out of reach anything DD could throw.

Meltdown, I meant to say. Yes, DD's temperature comes down when she takes the medication, but then goes back up again after a while. I suspected her behaviour could be linked to DD being unwell as we have never experienced this level of intensity and prolonged meltdown before. DD screams at the sound of her brother's voice and is totally uncontrollable outdoors, where there is a large crowd. DD can't communicate properly, so difficult to know what exactly she wants. DD is calmer indoors.

Which country are you in?

I would say if she was feverish and is behaving like this then illness is probably the cause and she needs to see a doctor. Why hasn’t she seen a doctor? Is he stopping you from taking her?

She saw a doctor before we left. The doctor said it was viral and we should continue with calpol and ibuprofen. We have been giving her during the trip and her temperature has gone down but the behaviour is one we have never witnessed before. She is generally calm and a happy child but has become suddenly very irritable during this trip with very intense and long meltdowns. We have done a few travels before and never experienced this. She has been recently diagnosed and is just 3 1/2years.

How long ago did she see a dr? She may need to be seen again as it could have developed in a bacterial infection. She needs to see a dr again as her symtoms have changed.

The travel it’s self and being in a different places can be very challenging to an autistic person, especially for a young child who is unlikely to understand fully what is happening. Have you tried social stories and visual time tables to explain what is happening?

Obviously the big elephant in the room is that she is being emotional and physically abused by her Dad. This will be esculating the situation and she must be very scared.

Will DD wear ear defenders?

I think taking DD out to busy places when you know she is unwell and will be overwhelmed and dysregulated is unfair and sets her up to fail.