DS, 4, issues in school Reception

[mollyminniemo]

Hi all
Just looking for some advice/thoughts. DS, 4 has started reception at mainstream. He is verbal/potty trained etc, no official Autism diagnosis but going through the process and as have an older DS with it, know he very clearly is. The key issues – behaviour- very erratic. Never still. Hyper, always on the move. Lacks focus. Very clear about only liking certain people and will express he doesn’t like people directly to them. No social cues/boundaries. Little interest in playing with other kids. However he is mainly a happy, funny and clearly bright boy.

He was at his school nursery and with some clear boundaries/set routines/at first I bought him in 5 min earlier so he got used to the classroom before other kids/picked him up early each day. But he got on really well.
Reception now- is going badly. I pick him up 2 hours early. Even with this, most days, I get calls from the school. I work. To see the school number flashing up, as I know you know- brings up that dread, the pressure, the anxiety, Sometimes its to inform me he says his tummy hurts and wants to go home. Others that he feels hot but they cant take his temperature. Once to tell me he wouldn't have his photo taken. Another to tell me he wouldn’t take his flu jab. Another to tell me he had done a poo in trousers- they were chasing him around the school- turns out he hadn't when we arrived at their request to change him. Another to tell me he was so erratic I needed to come even earlier and collect him that day after a few hours at school….

I get it- if a child has a rash/is sick/or temp: we need to collect them. But do I really need to be called every day about these things? As said he is bright, so knows if he goes to office, they call us, and someone comes to get him.
I am so low, so down about it.
He has a class of just 15 when capacity is 30. I feel school, should be able to cope. I have asked to see Senco and ask they back off and question why he was ok in the nursery. Why he is ok when he goes to breakfast club. But in the classroom- this all keeps happening.

What support is the school providing? What have they already tried that hasn’t worked? What outside agencies have they asked for advice from? Has an EHCNA been requested?

Is DS attending part-time as per your right to send him part-time, or has the school said he can only attend part-time? If the latter, that should not be happening. If you want DS to attend full-time, he can unless formally suspended. The school shouldn’t be calling you to informally collect DS early like that. Informal exclusions are unlawful. Don’t worry if they do suspend. A formal suspension rather than an unlawful informal exclusion it will a) provide you with evidence of unmet needs, b) force the school to follow due process, c) limit the number of days the school can suspend for, d) allow you to challenge any suspension, and e) once DS is compulsory school age ensure he receives alternative provision once he has reached that threshold.

2.17 of the School Admissions Code (which you can see here) makes it clear it is the parents’ choice:

“Admission authorities must provide for the admission of all children in the September following their fourth birthday. The authority must make it clear in their arrangements that where they have offered a child a place at a school:
a) that child is entitled to a full-time place in the September following their fourth birthday;
b) the child’s parents can defer the date their child is admitted to the school until later in the school year but not beyond the point at which they reach compulsory school age and not beyond the beginning of the final term of the school year for which it was made; and
c) where the parents wish, children may attend part-time until later in the school year but not beyond the point at which they reach compulsory school age.”

You may also find the school suspension and exclusion guidance helpful here. Most of it applies to those below compulsory school age. Where it doesn’t, it explicitly says so as stated on page 6.

Some bits you particularly might find helpful are:
“19. Suspending a pupil for a short period of time, such as half a day, is permissible but the formal suspension process must still be followed. Each disciplinary suspension and permanent exclusion must be confirmed to the parents in writing with notice of the reasons for the suspension or permanent exclusion.
20. Any exclusion of a pupil, even for short periods, must be formally recorded. It would also be unlawful to exclude a pupil simply because they have SEN or a disability that the school feels it is unable to meet…An informal or unofficial exclusion, such as sending a pupil home ‘to cool off’, is unlawful when it does not follow the formal school exclusion process and regardless of whether it occurs with the agreement of parents.”
And
“30. A part-time timetable should not be used to manage a pupil’s behaviour”

The school shouldn’t be calling you to change DS either. See the supporting pupils at school with medical conditions statutory guidance. Does DS have an intimate care plan?

Follow up all verbal conversations with emails to create a paper trail.

Thankyou so much. He has a near 1-1 with a TA who is lovely. She takes him out of classroom a lot. But I question why they leave the doors open. How is able to constantly get out of classroom and run riot through the school. We are applying for an EHCP and had the first paediatric assessment, now having to wait 6 months for the final one.

No we came to an "arrangement" but the school suggested I collect early every day as he can't cope in the afternoon and his behaviour deteriorates. I can just about manage this with help from family when I am at work. However I pushed for him to stay 15 extra minutes and build up gradually, they then said it wasn't working/he got tired/ratty/wanted to go home so it's gone back down to 1.30pm each week.

They even said recently they wanted to discuss him going even earlier than that each day, so this is all so helpful and good to know I can stand my ground and say no. The level of anxiety this is all causing, when I have to collect him earlier as it is every day, but then called constantly during the time he is in school is just making me so depressed about it all.

now having to wait 6 months for the final one.

No! Challenge this. The EHCP process is governed by statutory timescales. If the LA is going to issue an EHCP, they must finalise within 20 weeks of the first EHCNA request. In order to do this, they should send the draft by week 14. If the LA isn’t going to issue, they must inform you by week 16. You don’t have to sit back and accept the LA breaching the timescales. Have you had other assessments as part of the EHCNA - ed psych, SALT, OT?

If your area still has one, has the school asked the specialist teaching service for input?

You could ask to see the risk assessment.

If you want DS to attend full-time or part-time but longer than he is, he can, unless the school is formally suspending. If you want DS to attend e.g. 15 mins longer, don’t let the school intimidate you into collecting at 1.30pm.