My daughter was diagnosed with dyslexia at the start of this year, just after turning eight. Although the diagnosis was a relief — it explained why she’s been struggling to meet targets and working below age expectations — it also highlighted some other challenges. During her assessment, signs of dyscalculia were noted, something both the school and I can clearly see.
She experiences a lot of anxiety around maths, to the point that she picks the skin around her fingers until they’re sore. It’s really difficult to see her become so distressed. The school have said they may be able to help her access a dyscalculia assessment, though it’s not guaranteed. I’m currently waiting for an appointment with an educational therapist through the school, as they believe she may need a full child assessment.
Thankfully, she’s very happy at school she’s positive, hardworking, and her teachers describe her as one of the most determined children in the class. She listens carefully, always tries her best, and genuinely wants to do well. It breaks my heart to think how hard it must be for her to sit in a classroom and not fully understand what’s going on, despite how much effort she puts in.
The school are concerned about how far behind she will fall by the time she leaves primary school, so they’re keen to put interventions in place now. They’ve mentioned that an EHCP might be worth exploring, as it could provide one-to-one support, although there’s no guarantee it would be approved.
They worry as do I how this would affect her mental health and feel inadequate, they are already comparing test scores with friends and it just makes me so upset to know she is feeling embarrassed.
I truly can’t fault the school they’ve been wonderful and proactive, and her teachers have gone above and beyond to support her. But as a parent, I can’t help worrying about her future. My husband takes a very practical view — “it is what it is; let’s just get her the right help” — and I completely agree, but I still feel so sad for her sometimes. Perhaps that’s a maternal thing, but it’s hard not to feel emotional when you see your child struggling.
Ultimately, all I want is for her to be happy at school, to have the support she needs to make learning a little easier, and to help her manage the anxiety that leads to the skin-picking. I know school will never be easy for her, but I want it to be as positive as possible.
Sometimes I find myself wishing the school years away because I know how creative she is and how much she’ll thrive when she’s able to focus on her strengths. It’s a shame schools don’t always have the time or resources to celebrate those creative gifts as much as they should.
Has anyone else been in a similar situation? I’d really appreciate any guidance or advice on how best to support her — both emotionally and academically.
Thank you. 💛