Overwhelmed with life - SEN mum

[Missmylife]

Just here to moan, not sure anyone can help!

I am a mum to a 6 year old diagnosed with ASD and ADHD, and I’m just exhausted, and jealous of the people I see getting to enjoy a “normal” life with their kids!

Im tired of all it, chasing for the referral, going through the school appeal for specialist placement, getting the ASD diagnosis, the constant chasing for the ADHD diagnosis once they turned 6. Trying the medications, them not working, trying another… it’s never ending.

Normally, I just get on with things, but this weekend, I’m just done! I wish I was able to
take my child on holiday, or to a kids theme park, or even the cinema and bowling, but they would not cope with any of these things.

My life is now so small, and I just need a moan, I feel like I’ve completely lost who I am, and just waiting for the time when things become easier.

Sounds like you need to take the pressure off yourself. I know it’s hard but try to focus on the small wins and positives. These can be hard to see day to day but if you visit the same place or do the same thing a year later or even 6 months improvements can be apparent.

Make use of any ASD / SEN friendly cinema showings or theatre productions etc where wandering and shouting out are allowed. Look at policies at theme parks for a disabled pass to avoid queues.
Look for more natural outdoor activities that don’t involve waiting, winning or too much noise.

You are probably already doing things at home but you could do a home cinema night and activities to support sensory needs. Read The Out of Synch child has fun for activities at home.

Look on The Local Offer for your LA for activities and groups. Meeting other parents would help as they “ get it”. Have you had access to Early Bird Plus or a parent programme?
Did you get your specialist placement? If so staff should be able to offer hep and advice.
Be kind to yourself it’s exhausting juggling everything and fighting for things too.

The only real thing which helps me is journalling. It's like the only place I can have control of anything and feel 'normal'. Apart from being interrupted in my writing by my DD, nothing can really take it away from me, because I can go back to it whenever I get a moment. I know how you feel, it feels like all normal parts of life have been taken away from you, because of how bad the system is for us SEN parents and our children.