Mainstream or special school for ADHD / ASD girl - recommendations please?

[Jellybean023]

Would you recommend special schools or mainstream for a high functioning 6yo old girl with ADHD and ASD? Any recommendations for suitable schools in SW London? Can be state or independent.

DD is 6yo and diagnosed ADHD and ASD. She’s very bright, can absorb loads of facts and has wide ranging interests but struggles in school with lots of emotional regulation issues, difficulty sustaining attention, particularly in areas she has less interest in (mainly phonics and maths, which are clearly key foundational subjects), struggles with transitions, struggles with busy environments (prefers small groups) and, whilst she has friends and is sociable, often withdraws and plays by herself. We are starting to question whether her current school is the right one as they are not very experienced with SEN, although she is overall happy there, but not sure where would be better and don’t want to get it wrong. We think she’s academically very capable and don’t want her in a school that doesn’t promote this side of things but equally worry about another mainstream school not being able to support her and then having to move again. I have no personal experience of special schools at all, but on the face of it would say she isn’t special enough (except that she does need lots of support in school - her current school think she needs 1-on-1 support but we have so far failed to get funding for this).

If 1:1 is required but isn’t detailed, specified and quantified in F of the EHCP, have you appealed?

For SS, depending where in SW London you are, The Rise might be within travelling distance. Although you will need to ask about their current cohort because although they can admit KS1 pupils, I’m not sure they have any at the moment, which wouldn’t be good for DD. From 7, there is Brookways, but whether that is suitable really depends how DD presents. If DD2 is 6 and in Y2, for next September you could look at Hopescourt just into Surrey if that is doable.

We’re just going through the EHCP process and probably about to appeal.

We’re on the borders of Kingston, surrey and Sutton. Also close to Merton.

Just reigniting this thread as interested in other views. We are currently going through an appeal process and considering a variety of school options but still not sure what the right setting is.

For further context DD is currently at a highly academic, fast-paced independent school. She doesn’t hate school, isn’t school avoidant but is needing a lot of additional support to access the curriculum and is not meeting expectations on average. This is largely due to sensory issues, focus / attention difficulties and elements of demand avoidance plus plenty of emotional challenges. School thinks she needs 1-2-1 and probably OT and SLT which they can’t provide. She’d probably also benefit from a smaller, less busy environment.

On the one hand we are reluctant to move her whilst she’s happy (and she will not want to move) but on the other can see that this school is not really meeting her needs currently and fee may find it hard to get it named on the EHCP as they may not be able to easily provide what’s set out there. We would need to get EHCP funding for at least the 1-2-1 to keep her there as we can’t afford to pay for it ourselves.

The big question in my mind is whether a more nurturing / less academic independent school would actually suit her well or are we going to continue to face the same issues we do today if we move her there and end up having no to move her again. Or should we really be looking at the specialist independents now. We’ve visited one of these (others lined up) and it looks amazing in terms of SEN provision and facilities which I think would really help her, but I’m concerned she’s capable of more academically than they will offer. We’ve also seen a non-selective small independent that could really suit but it doesn’t start till year 5 (she’s year 2 now) and so I don’t know what I’d do with her for the next two years in that scenario. She will not want to move schools as she has friends etc but I can see that they are not really meeting her needs at the moment.

is needing a lot of additional support to access the curriculum and is not meeting expectations on average. This is largely due to sensory issues, focus / attention difficulties and elements of demand avoidance plus plenty of emotional challenges. and this school is not really meeting her needs currently

Read ^these back. This is telling you the current school isn’t working. The demands (academic, socially and emotionally) will only increase as DD moves into and through KS2. I would be looking at other options.

Will the current school even agree to being named? As a wholly independent school, they can’t be named if they object.

If the school isn’t named in the EHCP, be aware, while some LAs will occasionally come to an agreement whereby parents pay the fees and the LA funds the special educational provision, many will not. Such arrangements are less common than they were in the past. LAs will often say the parents are making suitable alternative arrangements, thereby relieving them of their duty.

@flawlessflipper sorry yes I agree that the current school isn’t working, I just want to make sure if we put her through the trauma of moving (given she doesn’t want to) that we move her to the right place so we don’t have to do it again. Though I’m also worried moving her could create more problems than it solves (given she’s currently happy).

We originally set out with the intention of coming to an agreement whereby we continued to pay the fees but got funding for additional support. However, now seeing that this probably isn’t really what she needs. The big question is whether a smaller, less fast-paced and more nurturing independent with more SEN experience (her current school is none of these things) could work for her or whether we’ll just have more of the same and eventually need to look more specialist. She’s mostly keeping up with learning, but finding it hard to demonstrate it as she can’t get her knowledge down on paper easily. She has good attendance, is happy at school, has friends etc but is easily disregulated (read tantrum type behaviour sometimes several times a day for various reasons). Her paediatrician is adamant that she has the potential to be a very high achiever in the right setting / with the right support and his view is that keeping her in mainstream (with lots of support) is important. However there are so many mixed opinions out there and others have said look at independent specialists. Im just not convinced these are right for her based on the one I’ve seen (which was an absolutely amazing school in so many ways) but don’t want to get this wrong.

Tantrum or meltdown? I would suggest the latter. And while I knew what you meant, when you are discussing it with schools and other professionals, I would use ‘meltdown’ otherwise they may misunderstand/jump to the wrong conclusions.

Has DD had a comprehensive EP report? You mention SALT and OT; were these reports Tribunal standard? These will help you understand what provision/type of placement DD needs. I would trust these far more than a paed. Some paeds are excellent, but the problem with many paeds is that they don’t understand SEN law or the scope of what specialist provision is available (or what provision other than MS or SS exists). Not all SS are the same, independent or not. I wouldn’t rule them out just on visiting one.

Is there another independent MS you think would be suitable and will offer a place? The decision may be made for you because from what you describe, there may not be an independent MS who will offer a place even if they are small, nurturing and more inclusive.

For recording work, has DD tried assistive tech and/or a scribe?

@flawlessflipper yes sorry definitely meltdowns and that is the language I would use. They are almost entirely environment or demand driven in my opinion.

We are working with lawyers at the moment re appealing the initial EHCP as part of which we’ve scheduled independent EP, OT and SLT reports which are happening in the next month. However, I do trust the paed in question to some extent - he’s a neurodevelopmental specialist with c.800 ADHD / ASD children under his care.

We’re looking at a variety of schools both mainstream and specialist. It’s early days as we’ve not got as far as formally consulting with any (awaiting reports etc as the original draft EHCP doesn’t come close to what is needed) but I do feel like I’m looking for a unicorn in terms of getting the right balance of additional support and academic stretch.

The EP, SALT and OT assessments will really help you understand what provision/type of placement DD needs.

In my experience, happiness is the most important aspect. Social happiness. A neurodivergent child will not go to any school and learn anything if they are not happy there. Moving a neurodivergent child against their will is unlikely going to work. If there is any chance that the LA would fund 1:1 in her current school, I would try this first. SALT and OT can be offered off site. We had the problem that NHS SALT and OT wouldn't go into my children's independent school, so I had to drive them to the local hospital for their sessions there during school hours. If that would fit in with your working hours, it could work. It worked well for my children. Most of the success of OT and SALT work depends on it being continued and practiced at home, so it is really good for the parent to be present. You can then also speak to Senco to duscuss what to implement into daily teaching plan. I think it really comes down to gut instinct. If you feel your daughter is happy and the school is supportive, I would go with that. In my experience, Audhd kids don't learn enough to meet expectations in any school. Too much going on. You'll likely have to do something at home, 1:1, where it's quiet. Or they get sucked into a special interest and learn through that, really rapidly, e.g. they learn reading and spelling through reading about a special interest. School, especially primary school, is important for socialising, making friends, and independent schools can foster special interests like music, drama or sports many state schools can't. My children had to drop out of school at some point but the skills and interests they picked up at their independent prep school carried them through the worst years of social anxiety and worldavoidance, allowing them to connect with the outside world and staying in contact with friends.