3 year old recently diagnosed ASD

[ThatPositiveMum]

My 3years 4 months Lo has recently been diagnosed with ASD. It's incredibly confusing how to proceed from here. Her nursery has been very supportive and has an EHCP underway. My Lo is verbal, says lots of words, phrases and sentences clearly but doesn't use language functionally. It's more of repeated phrases -echolalia. She's had a block of ST and they say she is likely a gestalt language processor. She isn't toilet trained, although she is super intelligent and a fast learner. She counts to 100, knows her alphabets and sounds, sings a lot, days of the week, colours, months of the year and all that but just doesn't communicate. She hand leads and has recently just started adding a word when leading the adult to what she wants. She enjoys playing independently and won't interact with other kids and also minimal interaction with her 21months okd brother. I'm worried she is starting reception next year and wanting to know if there are others in this same situation and what they have done to help their LO school ready.

My soon to be 3 YO is also on the spectrum, also got an ehcp underway. I’ve known he was since he was 1, he ticks every single box.

walking on tip toes, speech delay, hand flapping, I could go on and on. BUT he is really clever, and understands his emotions and everyone els s around him, and understands everything people say.

my LO does hand leading to what he wants. There are so many things you can do; talk to your HV for one. Secondly; I have found the nursery to be a great help in terms of offering me suggestions of things to do at home.

with ur nursery, they may suggest working on social skills by taking LO into small groups for smaller interactions first and then build this up to bigger groups when she can manage.

the speech and language course I’ve done, were, imo, dreadful. Really outdated and repeat the same things over and over.

Lastly I’d like to add I think you’re doing everything right by putting her in nursery which will also help prepare her for school.

Thank you for sharing and the encouragement. I'm always just thinking if there is more I can do. I'm seeing amazing skills she has like her advanced puzzle skills, her love for water and her sense of control/balance each time she climbs and jumps. So, I've signed her up for swimming and gymnastics classes and she loves it, but scared if it is even safe for her or the right thing to do. We also want to see a paediatrician or specialist, but not even sure what for or who we should be seeing to help with her brain development. I've also read about ABA therapy and wondering if this is something I should explore. Just trying to give her the best from this young age.

What are you scared about? As long as you have a professional over seeing them there’s nothing to be scare of. My little one loves water and we take him swimming a few times a month, he loves it, he’s started to learn to swim and kick his legs now.

he also went from not saying one letter to reciting the whole alphabet last week. Every child, regardless of ASD or not will go and their own pace. But if you find something your child loves, there’s no harm exploring it.

I really wouldn't do ABA therapy. I think with ASD, especially when they are young, you have to accept it as the normal way of being and you as the NT have to learn about it and start copying it, learn to be autistic yourself, in your communication, routines, preferences etc. rather than the other way around. When they get older, they might be mature enough to want to adapt, but I think they have to be able to understand what masking is and that it is something they can do if it's important/respectful but don't have to do/are forced to do all the time. I live with 3 autistic people, 2 children and 1 husband, so we do 99% in an autistic way, if that makes sense, as in theory, a nt person should find it easier to adapt to a different way of being and thinking than the other way round. When my children were young, inter personal communication was very little. I do believe autistic children learn a lot from screens, and that having a dvd/download of the same show and watching it over and over is important for them to learn language. It definitely was my children's prefered way. As a result, my British son speaks with a thick American accent. My daughter started to speak words of what she wanted at 6/7 months, quite complicated words, but never would properly chat until she was at least eleven/twelve. Before that we went through years of 'yes/no', 'choose a or b' communication, like: they asked: 'Frozen or Peppa Pig?', and then you answer what you prefer, and it's repeated in that style for an hour or so. None of that is worrying or bad/not good enough. It's a reasuring and natural way for many autistic children to learn to speak and they enjoy to use the same speech pattern/phrase over and over again. They also often enjoy asking the same question and hearing the same answer, it's reasuring, not because they are stupid or want to be annoying. They might not like communicating in person with other children. They might be mute in school, but they might enjoy texting. If your daughter wants to do swimming and gymnastics, why would you not let her do it? It's important in my experience to find something they love, a special interest, early on, as this is usually the activity they will learn other things through and also the way into employment. E.g. if they usually won't tolerate social situations and don'tenjoy chatting, they are often more likely to tolerate social interactions, communication etc in connection with their special interest.

The best thing to support DD starting school is the EHCP. Where are you in the process? Is the LA sticking to the timescales?

You mention SALT but not OT. Has DD had an OT assessment, including a sensory OT assessment? You might find some of the ideas in this booklet, this website and the Occuplaytional therapist’s resources.

What support is the nursery providing? Have they asked for advice from the specialist teaching service?

This is very insightful. My LO has lot of phrases and sentences which she has picked up mainly from tv shows. Although, I am mindful of screentime, I have to agree that most of her words, phrases and sentences have been obtained from these shows and she is able to repeat complete conversations, sometimes even in French (which isn't spoken at home) from educational shows. It's just that the phrases and sentences aren't always used within context.

The nursery has completed the lengthy report and was just waiting to include the autism diagnosis before submitting. My LO already has an early support pathway approved and we are on the waiting list to see a specialist. A specialist teacher was sent to her nursery as part of her EHA to observe her and give the nursery some recommendations. She also has an Individual Child plan ((ICP) set up by the nursery to support her. We started with SALT first as we initially thought it was only a case of delayed speech. I'll definitely reach out for a sensory OT assessment. Thanks.

Submit the EHCNA request now. You don’t need to wait for the diagnosis.