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Here you'll find advice from parents and teachers on special needs education.

I think my teen DD has ODD

5 replies

Whatsthestorymorningglory95 · 18/06/2025 17:05

Sorry if I posted this in the wrong place.

Since my DD was a toddler she has been extremely defiant and had major temper tantrums way beyond what most would deem ‘normal’.

School was always a non issue until she hit Secondary School. Since then it’s been horrific really. I have read about girls ‘masking’ and the ‘coke bottle effect’ which is exactly what my experience was. She would literally explode the second we got home from school.

We found out she was self-harming at age 11. We did take her to counselling but I don’t think this particularly helped her. She hasn’t self harmed for a good few months now but I am well aware the urge to do it may come back again.

We have been hauled up at the school multiple times as DD is consistently being disruptive, argumentative and defiant in class. This has been escalating ever since she started. She has been threatened with expulsion.

The more I read the more I think DD has ODD. She is on the waiting list for ADHD assessment but this may take another couple of years.

This really isn’t just normal teenage stroppy behaviour. It’s disrupting all of our lives at home and making everyone miserable as it just feels so toxic.

I guess I am asking if you had an ODD child what worked for you? I am looking at counselling.

OP posts:
perpetualplatespinning · 18/06/2025 17:11

Rather than ODD, have you consider ASD? Some can present similarly, especially if they have a PDA profile.

Some people find the books The Explosive Child and the Out of Sync Child helpful. Others find PDA strategies or non-violent resistance resources useful.

What support is the school providing? Making school easier will improve home life. Does she have an EHCP?

Whatsthestorymorningglory95 · 18/06/2025 17:25

I have looked at PDA but she fits ODD more. I don’t think ASD.
We don’t have EHCP here but the school have said they have a plan in place and will treat her as ASN.
Some teachers can handle her better than others and can manage her better. Some teachers seem to escalate the situation.

OP posts:
perpetualplatespinning · 18/06/2025 19:10

Request a meeting with the school about further support.

Whatsthestorymorningglory95 · 18/06/2025 20:30

I think I will need to. I have just ordered the book The Explosive Child. Thank you for the recommendation.

OP posts:
CoCo19o2 · 09/02/2026 18:08

Ooh you've just described my DD, av came on here to write the same and look for help. I see u posted this 7 month ago how have yous been. Did u find the books helpful?. Am just looking for help foe my dad and my self.xx

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