My DC is a young AuDHD adult and has been taking ADHD meds since they were 14. Total game changer for school and allowed them to get some good GCSE results. Wheels fell off at A Level due to school withdrawing support (whole other story) so left education at 18 completely burnt out and has been at home recovering ever since. Still taking the meds at a reduced dose.
They occasionally have a day off the meds and seem to cope well providing there’s no pressure on them. In fact on those days we seem to get a bit of our happy, funny, chaotic child back, like their personality resurfaces. On the meds, while better able to focus they are much more serious and rigid and the autistic part of them is very much evident. They are very reclusive and reluctant to leave their bedroom. Also have no interest in being an adult and very much want to stay at home and be looked after. Obviously this isn’t going to work longer term. So right now they are stuck and we’re struggling to find a way forward when the answer to every question and suggestion is no.
My worry is coming from the issue that, whilst they may not be physically dependent on the meds, psychologically they most definitely are. Any day off meds is usually accidental, due to oversleeping and missing the window to take them in the morning. This is met with anxiety and meltdown, but actually the fear of an unmedicated day is always much worse than the reality. They do just fine once the initial panic is over.
Sorry it’s longwinded getting here but my question is this. Should these meds be taken daily regardless, or is it better to view them as a means to an end i.e. take them when you need them to get a job done? I’m getting different opinions from their adhd clinician and their psychotherapist, who have opposite view points. From my pov the meds seem to be suppressing half of who they are and the mental addiction to them is disturbing. As they have gone through puberty to adulthood taking these drugs, I worry that they have no idea how to deal with their adhd without them and surely that’s important? Meds may not always be available, there are shortages and access to care is sometimes unpredictable. Should I be suggesting a break from meds, to try to reset their relationship with them?
I guess I’m looking for people’s experiences of using meds to manage adhd and trying to understand it from my DCs perspective. Any wisdom? Thanks