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Here you'll find advice from parents and teachers on special needs education.

Not using the toilet at all! HELP!

6 replies

Tobycarvery11 · 20/01/2025 23:32

I have a daughter who is 4 and a half and non verbal autistic, we started potty training her on news years day 2024 and she's done so well! Shes totally dry by day, and wears a nappy at night, that is untill recently, she's only ever done a poo a handful of times in the potty or toilet in all that time, her usual routine is that she will go once her nappy is on at night, and we will change it before she goes to sleep.

In recent weeks she's started refusing the go to the toilet at all at school, holding untill she comes home, and then going on the potty.

it's now turned into refusing even for me and her dad, and instead just wetting herself once a day and that's it. School don't know what to do, and neither do we. Now she's refusing to wear a nappy at bed time at all which we aren't on board with as we know she will wet the bed, so we're up all night waiting for her to be in a really deep sleep so we can get one on her. And now she's even refusing to wear pants. Obviously that's non negotiable but it's a real fight everyday, I had to send her to school with draw string shorts in her back as a backup incase she wouldn't keep her pants on. I know this is unlikely to be a common thing but what do I do?

she literally won't use the toilet after doing so well for a whole year, and now won't wear nappies either. So I've literally got no options

OP posts:
TealShark · 21/01/2025 00:13

Have you tried the charity ERIC for advice? Website has bunch of useful resources.

ERIC

Home - ERIC

Find trusted information and support online

https://eric.org.uk/

BrightYellowTrain · 21/01/2025 13:48

Is DD constipated and has her urine been checked for a UTI?

Have you tried seamless and seamfree pants? Or boys pants?

Has DD had a sensory OT?

Tobycarvery11 · 21/01/2025 16:19

She often gets constipation and o have medication I can use if I notice she's not been for a day. I've bought a load of potty training pants to try, if not I'll try boys pants, and no she's not had sensory OT

OP posts:
Tobycarvery11 · 21/01/2025 16:20

She did have a urine infection about a month ago, but she had antibiotics and if cleared up

OP posts:
Tobycarvery11 · 21/01/2025 16:34

I've had a real think about the issues today and how I can solve them or at least ease them a bit.

  1. not using the toilet during the day, all I can do about that is encourage regular drinking and regular toilet breaks and be consistent, she's also gone into potty training pants as a posed to normal pants.
  2. Refusinh a nappy at bedtime, I was looking today for a sleepsuit without feet and preferably a zip that I could put on backwards. That way if OH wrestle her into a nappy and sleepsuit she wouldn't be able to get it off, but I could find one in her size so I've bought her an all in one swimming costume with a zip at the back, it's long sleeved and knee length. I'm hoping that will work. Bought a size bigger than she is so it's comfy to sleep in. I know it sounds mad for her to sleep in a swimming costume but it's all I can think to do
  3. Im going to get her an appointment to see a doctor and see if they can refer her to OT
OP posts:
BrightYellowTrain · 21/01/2025 17:36

Not all areas commission sensory OT on the NHS. If your ICB does, it is worth looking at a referral. In some areas, you can self refer. If DD has an EHCP, OT can be included in there even if the NHS doesn't offer it. If DD doesn't have an EHCP, you should request an EHCNA.

I would ask the GP to re-check DD’s urine.

Sometimes, maintenance treatment for constipation is required. Going to the toilet doesn’t necessarily mean DD isn’t constipated.

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