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SEN

Here you'll find advice from parents and teachers on special needs education.

Worried about DS starting reception

2 replies

Minime16 · 12/01/2025 11:40

Hi everyone. I could possibly be over thinking here but that’s something I do a lot!

3yo DS (turns 4 next month) will be starting mainstream reception in September. The educational psychologist told me that she doesn’t think he’s “severe” enough for a specialist school.

I received a draft copy of his EHCP on Friday. All seems ok apart from nothing about toileting seems to be on there. He’s still in nappies and I honestly can’t see that changing by September. I’ll email his case worker tomorrow to discuss that with her.

Anyway, now the worrying has started. Things like him being left out, having no friends, not being invited to parties etc. I know I’m not doing myself any favours thinking like this and those kind of things might not even happen but as his mum I can’t help feeling sad. I have an 8yo DS (with no SN) and I can’t help but compare how different their school lives are going to be.

Hope I don’t offend anybody with this thread. I’m just a mum who’s worrying I guess

OP posts:
BrightYellowTrain · 12/01/2025 13:40

The educational psychologist told me that she doesn’t think he’s “severe” enough for a specialist school.

What do you think? LAs and LA professionals often tell parents their DC doesn’t need SS when they do and it is about the LA saving money.

I received a draft copy of his EHCP on Friday. All seems ok

Check the LA very carefully. It is unusual for the LA’s initial draft to be OK. It is likely other amendments will be necessary, not just about toileting.

Go through all the reports with highlighters. Highlight all DS’s special educational needs in one colour and all the provision to meet the needs in another colour. Each need should have corresponding provision.

Then go through the draft and make sure all the highlighted needs are in B and the highlighted provision is in F. Make a note of anything the LA have omitted from the draft, any needs without corresponding provision, any woolly and vague wording, and anything the reports have failed to include.

Check for vague and woolly wording such as “access to”, “would benefit from”, “regular”, “up to”, “or equivalent”, “opportunities for”, “as appropriate”, “would be useful/helpful”, “such as”, “e.g.”, “etc.”, “as required”, “as advised”, “key adult(s)”, “small group”. A woolly and vague EHCP means it isn’t worth the paper it is written on. DS might not get the support he needs, and it would be unenforceable. The wording in F needs to be detailed, specified and quantified.

When you come across woolly and vague wording, check the reports to see if they are woolly and vague or if the LA has watered down provision. If the reports are vague and woolly, ask the LA to go back to the report writer(s) to make the reports detailed, specified and quantified. Provision in EHCPs is taken from the reports, so if the reports are vague and woolly, the EHCP will be too. If the LA has watered down provision, make sure to request the LA sticks to the wording in the reports.

Then make sure any health or social care provision that educates or trains is in F. For example, LAs like to put therapies like SALT and OT in G when it belongs in F.

Sunshineclouds11 · 17/01/2025 20:16

Hi,

Just wanted to add, my DS was in nappies until 6 weeks before school started!
We had meetings with the school prior to him starting due to SEN and spoke about nappies and they did say he would be changed.
I don't know what happened tbh he literally done it himself one day, so don't give up hope just yet.

I also had the same worries regarding friends etc.
it took him awhile to find a friend but he was never left out. Relationships do sometimes take awhile to form anyway whilst they suss each other out.
Reception parties seem to be the whole class in my experience.

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