Internal exclusion and hitting

[HiImTrying]

Hello,

This is slightly a blow off steam and perhaps a 'please help' post.

DS is 8, Yr 3. Autistic with PDA profile, awaiting ADHD diagnosis. No EHCP (been waiting since yr1 for Ed Psych availability for report to submit)

The headteacher has just called me, for the second time this week. And this is the 8th 'incident ' I have had a call about this half term for a serious offence. DS has hit his TA on the arm at breaktime because she told him to wait when he wanted her attention and touched his shoulder while saying it.

Headteacher has said he is not allowed breaks today and tomorrow and cannot go back into the classroom either and is classing this as a internal exclusion. He kneed his friend earlier in the week because they accidentally smacked him with their coat sleeve. Earlier in the term during PE he punched a classmate in the chest while playing a tig game because she tagged him hard on the arm.

Clearly being touched is a trigger. But this behaviour is unacceptable. His behaviour at home is just as bad if not worse. I have tried everything. I can't make it stop.

I feel like I've failed him as a parent and he will be permanently excluded. I cannot survive not working full time so if this happens I am screwed.

I can't stop crying. I have nothing left in me to give.

What can I do?

It's pretty clear that the first thing that needs to be put in place is a 'no touch' policy for him, if it's known as a huge trigger then staff definitely shouldn't be doing it. PE lessons need to consider this trigger for him and ways around it found. It's harder with the kids in the playground but maybe a talk around how different people experience touch differently and some people don't like it might help.

As for the EHCP, that is not good enough. You could try contacting IPSEA, this is what they have to say on the matter.
https://www.facebook.com/IPSEAcharity/posts/families-frequently-tell-us-about-delays-in-the-ehc-needs-assessment-process-due/771131668385934/

You have not failed your son, he has been dealt a very difficult hand and you are left trying to manage that with little to no support. The school can't 'class something' as a permanent exclusion unless it is a proper permanent exclusion where they have followed a long and complicated process showing they have done all they can. And as they don't even have a 'no touch' policy for your son it doesn't seem like they've tried much. If they're classing it as a proper fixed term exclusion then they need to go through the proper formal process and give you a a formal written notice from the head. I'm not sure what the school mean when they say he is permanently excluded? Do they mean from being taught in the classroom? Or do they mean from the school? Or did they mean a fixed term exclusion?

No EHCP (been waiting since yr1 for Ed Psych availability for report to submit)

Has a EHCNA actually been requested? If not, you don’t need to wait for a EP report first. Request an EHCNA yourself. In their website, IPSEA has a model letter you can use. If an EHCNA has been requested in Y1, the LA is in breach of the statutory timescales. Send the Director of Children’s Services another one of IPSEA’s model letters. If that doesn’t work, you need a pre-action letter. SOSSEN can help with this or you can look elsewhere. If a pre-action letter doesn’t work, judicial review proceedings will.

What support is the school providing? What other strategies have they tried? If they know touch is an issue why did the TA touch DS’s shoulder, why are they not adapting PE to include non-contact games/exercise/activities and why are they not ensuring others give DS space? Have you spoken to the SENCO?

I'm not sure what the school mean when they say he is permanently excluded?

The school hasn’t said DS is permanently excluded and an internal exclusion is not the same as a fixed term suspension.

Hello,

Thank you both for your replies. I apologise if, because of the rambling, some of my points and terminology weren't clear.

The EHCNA has not been requested. The school cannot submit the request because they are awaiting an Ed Psych report to be able to do so. This report was requested in July 2023 at the end of Yr1. So far the school have been unable to obtain an Ed Psych to complete this report. This is apparentlystill the case.

Thank you for the link of the letter template. Although having read this I am concerned I will not be eloquent enough in my reasons given in the letter. I have however requested a subject access request form from school this afternoon to get copies of everything they have for DS on previous reports or incident documentation to help me. If anyone had completed this, do my reasons need to be detailed and complex or can I do bullet points?

Thank you for suggesting a no touch policy. I will bring this up in the meeting that is now due on Tuesday. I just feel powerless against the school. I want to work with them and not against them and do not want to blame everything DS does on his SEN but I really do feel helpless.

He has just last week got his classroom fidgets back that he can use for transitioning(6 weeks into term, he had these in yr2). He enjoys those and had been asking for them since the start of term. They have tried visual ques and behaviour boards but those seem to have the opposite of the desired effect and make him frustrated (PDA type of issue). I've given the new yr3 teacher a link to the PDA website for prompts on how to request things of DS. In yr2 his one of his teacher was the SENCO and they implemented allowing DS time out in the reading corner but I have been told that yr3 is about focused work and there is no room for such a space in the classroom. In Yr1 he had his own desk away from the other students, but they took this away in yr2. Perhaps I suggest they try this again for more personal space?

It is my own personal worry that he will be permanently excluded, although that is based on fear and not knowledge. I do not know any of the rules on exclusion , I just assumed schools were allowed to exclude students if they wanted to. Now I know, I will read up on the law regarding this.

The head told me his removal from class and breaktime for today and tomorrow was classed as an 'internal exclusion'. I have read the school behaviour policy and it is their policy and sanction for this type of behaviour. Certainly I don't want DS hurting people and agree he needs to be removed from the situation. I don't want to be 'one of those parents who blames everything on SEN', but DS does not care for any type of discipline. He would be quite happy to not go to class but I do think with the possibility of having ADHD and his behavioural traits, that removal of his break time is setting him up for failure. He NEEDS to move.

Thanks again.

The EHCNA has not been requested. The school cannot submit the request because they are awaiting an Ed Psych report to be able to do so.

This is not true. An EP report is not required before submitting an EHCNA request. You should make the request yourself now using IPSEA’s model letter. Don’t worry about not being eloquent enough, that won’t be the case. You can make bullet points if you prefer. It doesn’t have to be war and peace. The legal threshold for an EHCNA is relatively low - a) has or may have SEN, and b) may need special educational provision to be made via an EHCP.

Following your meeting on Tuesday (and any other verbal conversations), follow up with an email to create a paper trail.

A personal desk is a good idea. A pop up tent may work for time out or a blanket over the desk/so DS can sit underneath

It is worth reading the suspension and exclusion guidance here. The school needs to make reasonable adjustments to the behaviour policy. Removing break is likely to backfire.

It is also worth reading IPSEA and SOSSEN’s websites and the SENCOP to understand the SEN system better.

Thank you so much @EndlessLight for your reply and taking the time to read my post. How frustrating that the school, or specifically the SENCO and team told me that an Ed Psych report was needed. I feel like sometimes there is TOO much information and it's overwhelming. I'll use that template and get it submitted ASAP.

I do prefer emails anyway and always write to teachers and school via email or class app if quick rather than talk face to face so I will keep this going to ensure a paper trail -good idea.

DS does like to be covered and on PE days always tries to wear his hoodie over his head to cover noise so I will suggest the tent/blanket. Although saying this, when I say tries to wear his hood over his head, he is always told off for this as 'other children are not allowed to wear their hoods over their head'. I don't know where acceptable adjustments would start and end.

Does DS use ear defenders or noise cancelling headphones? If not, worth trying. Being able to wear a hoody with the hood up would be a reasonable adjustment.