Screen time guilt ASD

[Newsenmum]

I have so much guilt about my 4yo screen time. We’re waiting for autism assessment but pretty convinced (as is nursery and other professionals we work with). It’s got worse over the years and his special interest is something he watches on repeat throughout the day. He is absolutely obsessive about it and if isn’t watching it is reinacting it. If we go out then it’s never for long (he gets stressed out and we’re better at managing how much is ‘enough’ so we come home and we’re limited by places that he knows and aren’t busy). And then when we get home again of course he’s back on the iPad. I know part of it is stimming but I don’t know how much. I spend so much time trying to get him to do other things but nothing works. Sometimes I feel like throwing all of his toys away (I won’t). But I can’t just redirect his interest like suggested.

I don’t have any friends with children on the spectrum so this is probably why I feel so awful comparatively. I just can’t get over the guilt of it all! And knowing what is ‘normal’ and acceptable.

hi @Newsenmum , I'm surprised this hasn't had any response, but don't worry you are definitely not alone.

My ASC DD is nine and spends a lot of time on the ipad when she's very stressed or exhausted. It's often the only way to sooth her during or after a panic attack/meltdown, and she really loves imaginary play and stories, so she gets fixated on a series and consumes everything she can find. Then she comes off the pad and spends hours drawing, writing and acting out the show. It may be a cop out on my behalf, but I think it really helps her to processes things.

I find setting really predictable time frames and boundaries for her TV are really helpful. She knows she gets X amount of time after school, and X time on the weekend mornings. We always discuss at the start of the day if the timing will change - but I never shortchange her on the agreed amount of time, that's not worth the drama. It's been like this since she was three or four.

But, when we're having a bad week boundaries go out of the window and I find it really hard to return back to the normal schedule.

oh, and lots of time checks are key: "you've got about ten minutes left, five minutes, two minutes, ok finish this scene..." I set a timer and often watch the last few minutes with her.

Is there any merch attached to his favourite show? We collected all the Paw Patrol pups and vehicles over time and when that was DD's favourite show and she spent hours reenacting the episodes.

I agree with merch. Also possibly printing off colouring pictures of his favourite characters and maybe if they have a magazine getting that. You can then also cut the magazine up after reading and make pictures or scrap books for him to look through. You could also make the characters out of playdough (probably won't look anything like them but who cares!). You could pretend to be the characters and go to the park pretending to be them (at a quiet time) or you could go for a walk somewhere quiet and get him to tell you what happens in all his favourite episodes if he can. Mine used to love talking at me about his special interest and these are all the sorts of things we used to do.