EHCP/trigger for self harm

[Spencer0220]

I have no idea if I've done the trigger warning right.

My sister phoned me today absolutely at her wits end. I thought maybe some of the lovely parents on here could help point us in the right direction.

Her eldest son, 13, has diagnosed autism and ADHD. Diagnosed autistic at 8, ADHD last year.

He is struggling at school. He refuses to do any school work or homework that he doesn't like or deem "worthwhile". He takes all lesson to write 3 sentences at best unless he likes the subject. He talks to whomever he is placed near.

He can't be placed anywhere near a window, as he will throw objects out of the window. Every lesson.

He refuses to attend any detention set.

If a teacher tries to reprimand him, he either walks out, or shrugs and tells them to write a referral slip for the inclusion room because he doesn't want to be in that classroom.

Last term he served an exclusion for racist language. He was using derogatory terms I won't repeat. He's learnt nothing from this.

If he thinks a teacher has wronged him in some way, he will remember this forever and bear a massive grudge and refuse to engage at all. No matter what is said. Or if a non ND person would in fact find the teacher to have acted properly. He refuses to respect teachers unless they have proven in his mind, to be worthy of this.

I don't know if this has anything to do with it, but he absolutely idolises Andrew Tate and looks down on women.

Today, my sister was phoned to collect him because he was unwell.

This is the trigger warning. He told his stepdad that he wasn't unwell. He used his fingers down his throat to make himself vomit because he had no interest in staying in school. And he will do it again because he knows school will make him go home.

My sister has got a meeting with the SENCo and his form tutor in 10 days. She wants to push him to be EHCP assessed. Up until now, school have been very reluctant.

She also doesn't know if he will be able to remain at his school, or if he should be moved to somewhere specialist.

Any suggestions for moving forward gratefully received. I may not get on very well with my sister, but I know my nephew is a piece of work and she is really struggling.

Yes, DS should request an EHCNA. On their website, IPSEA has a model letter she can use. DN clearly needs far more support than he is receiving and this current school isn’t an appropriate setting for him. While going through the EHCP process, if attending school isn’t appropriate DS should look at securing AP, either directly via the school or if DN can’t attend school full time via the LA.

She can also request social care assessments. Contact have model letters she can use for this on their website.

Is DN on medication?

It is important to remember this is a disabled child who has significant unmet needs, it isn’t helpful to use terms like “a piece of work”.

Thank you @SearchingForSolitude

What's a EHCPNA? What is AP? Alternative placement? Forgive me I don't understand all the acronyms yet.

DN is unmedicated. I understand when he was diagnosed autistic, CAMHS assessment was that he was not in need of any. My sister is unable to refer back to them. Even if he could go back, waiting list is years

AP is alternative provision.
EHCP is an Education, Health and Care Plan. A legal document that sets out a child’s needs and the provision they require. The EHCNA is the needs assessment that is first requested as part of the process of getting an EHCP.

Was medication not discussed when DN was diagnosed with ADHD last year?

Thank you!

As far as I know, medication was not discussed then either. They rushed through the assessment because paperwork came to light that showed he should have been assessed for it at 8. Alongside the autism.