EHCP nightmare; schools turning my kid down and preschool calling the shots

[Clio82]

Hi all,

I’ve got a tricky one here. My son is nearly four and has a significant speech delay and Pica (trying to eat non food items like young toddlers do and finding it hilarious when told no). No diagnosis yet but pediatrician believes he is developmentally delayed and showing signs of ADHD. He is bright and sociable but struggles with expressive speech and his understanding is delayed, although always improving.

He was doing well at the nursery he’d been at since 13 months old. Apart from his speech delay and having to stop him eating sand, etc they had no concerns. They believed he’d be fine in mainstream school

We moved house and he started preschool in September 2023 and within three weeks they were recommending an EHCP, which I agreed to.

At the new (larger) setting my son is reported to be constantly flitting between activities, hardly using any functional language, unable to focus on anything for more than a minute and barely interacting with the other kids. This is a stark contrast to home and a deterioration from the previous setting.

The manager/SENCO hates the idea of my son attending a mainstream school. I contacted the SENCOs at my preferred schools and one said outright on the phone they’d struggle to accommodate. The other visited my son at the preschool, watched him for half an hour or so and essentially said they wouldn’t be able to cope with him even with an EHCP. The preferred school didn’t respond to me directly, they went to the preschool and arranged the visit and I was informed and invited last minute. The preschool manager/SENCO had a chat with the school SENCO beforehand and they were doing a lot of “talking with eyes” while I was there. When I outlined how well my son responds to instructions the SENCO interrupted me and said “oh, maybe he’s just copying you and doesn’t actually understand.” The preschool manager interrupted me when I talked about my kid’s strengths, just as she has played down his strengths in her feedback for all the professional reports, to the point the pediatrician told me she probably over egged his issues to get the EHCP approved.

I appreciate the preschool starting this process and I believe they mean well, but I now feel they’re inappropriately involved and calling the shots. I called the previous setting and they said the reports from the new preschool don’t fit with what they saw and they reckon the preschool jumped the gun and didn’t wait to get to know my son.

I’ve now changed my parental preference to a school with a speech and language unit that my son can be placed at through the EHCP process, after heavy persuasion by the preschool and having spoken to their lovely SENCO. I’m really afraid they’re going to go to the preschool and also decide they can’t cope with my kid and he won’t get a place anywhere!

Does anyone have any thoughts? How much say should a preschool have in my son’s school options for next year? Thanks!

I am unclear if you have a finalised EHCP yet or not?

I suspect not. In which case, places are allocated according to the admissions criteria. A place cannot be refused just because DS has SEN.

With an EHCP, unless the school is wholly independent, the LA can only refuse to name parental preference if the LA can prove:
-The setting is unsuitable for the age, ability, aptitude or special educational needs (“SEN”) of the child or young person; or
-The attendance of the child or young person would be incompatible with the provision of efficient education for others; or
-The attendance of the child or young person would be incompatible with the efficient use of resources.
The bar for this is higher than many realise. If the LA can’t prove this they can, and must, name your preferred placement even if the school objects. Although the LA may refuse and force you to appeal.

Thank you, Searching!

I’ve just had the EHCP redrafted as there were a lot of issues with it; contradictions, mistakes and major points omitted, including all my views.

Haven’t seen the final version yet as case officer is on leave but it’s all complicated by the fact the EHCP was initially drafted without waiting for the pediatrician report and I wasn’t sent it until after the redraft, so don’t know yet how much was included.

I decided to change my parental preference partly due to the senco’s attitude at my original preferred school (as described above). She seemed obstructive and undermined what the head told me when I visited, so I could see it was going to be a battle from day one.

Both schools are outstanding so not concerned about the educational provision, especially with the speech and language unit at the new preference and really understanding SENCO, but it is 2.8 miles away compared with 0.5 miles.

Do you have a view on how involved the current preschool should be? I do feel very silenced by the manager there as she’s present in all meetings, interrupts and talks over me, as well as butts in to answer questions I ask of the professionals! I know she’s having conversations in the background because she used to be a SEN case officer at and has proudly admitted to pulling a few strings (got the initial ‘No to assess’ overturned very quickly). I appreciate this but I think it’s getting OTT now and she really doesn’t know my son very well.

2.8 miles is not far in comparison to how far many DC with EHCPs travel, but non-wholly independent schools can’t just turn DS down. EHCPs don’t work like that. The nursery should be involved with the EHCP process, but they should still be allowing you to speak/ask questions of others etc.

Hmm, I think could be better, could be worse.

It's fantastic that you have two viable options within 3 miles, that you've got the EHCP so quickly and that you've got knowledgeable people helping you (albeit with poor bedside manner).

If I were you, I'd do whatever seems most likely to get him into a suitable setting quickly and try not to take the patronising people too personally if they seem to be basically doing their jobs.

You do have to emphasise the negatives in the EHCP process sadly.

I make a PowerPoint every so often (for me) of all the cool stuff DD has done, for low times.

Thanks everyone for your replies! Much appreciated.