Nocturnal 15 year old ND DD - help!

[Justworkingitout]

DD (16 years old and year 11) is autistic, ADHD (on slow release meds), OCD and high anxiety. She says she’ll go to sleep by a certain time but won’t. Last night it was 5am and then awake at 8am even though it’s Saturday. During the school week it may be as late as 2am and then I have to wake her at 7am. I can block her phone from my phone at a certain time but she said she’ll scream the house down, run away etc etc if I do that. She will wake the entire house if she does that (other kids) and my partner (not her dad) has to get up at 5am for a physically demanding job so his sleep is vital. These are not threats - she will do that. She’s emotionally disregulated and highly anxious and her phone is her emotional crutch. Again, this morning she promises that she’ll go to sleep by a certain time tonight but I know when it comes to that she’ll find it impossible to switch off. I’m at a loss and very frustrated with her and worried for her as she’s not getting enough sleep.

Melatonin? Although she'd need to put the phone down in order to give that a chance to kick in.

Personally I would just confiscate the phone and allow it back for x hours a day dependent on complying with sleep health etc. She's basically blackmailing you to her own detriment. Best to confiscate earlier so that she's over the initial anger before your DP is trying to sleep!

I do get that it's a complete nightmare doing that, but having gone through similar sleep situation with ADHD DD, it was hugely easier to deal with everything when she was no longer sleep deprived.

Thank you for your thoughts. I don't think that will work unfortunately as my partner goes to sleep pretty early and she wouldn't voluntarily give up her phone at that time and she may even be doing homework/GCSE revision. If it was just me and her living together I would turn it off from my phone but it's hard with others in the house. Yep she is absolutely blackmailing and manipulating me and it makes me so sad.