So for back story my daughters 2 and I’ve had health visitors involved with my daughter since 18 months due to autism concerns such as Stims, communication and language, socialising, behaviours, eating etc the list goes on.they’ve always seemed understanding and have shared my concerns. Today I went to clinic to get my daughter weighed as her eating is beyond picky at this point, I honestly think she may have ARFID. A health visitor today (who I’ve never even met or spoken to) and has never been involved with my daughter was absolutely vile. Dismissed everything I said, blamed my parenting for my daughter’s behaviours and said it’s because I don’t have boundaries in place when this isn’t true at all. My daughter is well aware of right and wrong, but when she’s having a meltdown etc she can’t self regulate AT ALL. It doesn’t matter what you do, she has her own way of dealing with things. And quite frankly I’m not going to punish something that she can’t help. Instead I look for techniques and strategies to actually help situations. Also as far as her eating the health visitor just basically said I’m giving in by giving her sweet things (she only eats jam sandwiches, snacks such as crisps, bread sticks, crackers , bananas and apples, toast etc atm which she’s had issues with eating for MONTHS). I’ve tried everything with her eating possible, nothing works, if she won’t eat something she won’t eat it. Health visitors advice is to leave it out for her and if she don’t eat it offer it her again later. So basically she wants me to starve my daughter? I don’t think she grasps that if a child has an eating disorder they WONT EAT what they don’t want to!! I would much rather give my child food that she will eat and offer something new gradually as I believe fed is best! I told her over and over I’ve tried everything and to me she just didn’t care, in all honesty I don’t even think she believes in autism. I just feel so frustrated that my daughters been fobbed off and I’ve been made to feel like it’s my fault. Now I’m stressed and worried about what’s going to be put on the system following our visit after all the fighting I’ve done so far to get support for our daughter. Please tell me I’m not the only one who’s had to listen to this from a health visitor.