Will DD be accepted for mainstream?

[Bitsyvonmuffling77]

DD3 has speech delay, which is compounded by her near silence at nursery which she attends full time. We see a private speech therapist who also does sessions with her in nursery which her keyworker then implements in some 121 time with her. Her understanding is great, her speech at home is ok and has been steadily improving since we started therapy in March.

She was referred by the therapist for ASD diagnosis which I understand there is a long wait. The report said you would never pick DD out in her nursery class as having ASD (she has no stims, great eye contact, affectionate, role plays etc) but they feed ASD is the cause of her speech delay (also high functioning ASD in DH family).

As well as being a summer born which meant I was already wavering a little about her being ready to start school, I have heard anecdotally that many mainstream schools do not accept non-verbal children?

I must admit this has thrown me a little. Other than her delay and occasional sensitivity to crying children, she is bright and has no behavioral issues. She loves watching and following other children, holds hands etc but doesn't know how to 'play' with them yet without some guidance.

Just looking for any experience if DD is likely to be able to attend mainstream (and thrive with proper support if she still needs it in a years time) or if she is going to need to go to specialist.

Forgive me for sounding blunt, but I guess I worry that in a specialist school that there will be potentially more extreme behaviour from other children and her learning would be delayed if they did not teach standard curriculum, which would then impact her long term?

I am a bit stuck with what to do for the best given applications open this year. I know a lot can change in a years time and we can always move her into specialist if she struggled in reception? Would she even be accepted?

I just dont want her to fall down the gaps of not being able to thrive in mainstream but a specialist school also not working for her either.

There are so few places in specialist schools that the question is more would you be able to get her into one if you wanted.

From what you have written your DD sounds like a sweetheart, and capable of great things, but also the exact kind of child for whom mainstream can be problematic.

Being quiet (sounds like she has selective mutism rather than being non-verbal) will be isolating and make it hard to learn alongside other kids. Being well-behaved is perversely a problem because overstretched teachers and TAs will ignore the kid sat quietly in the corner not learning anything.

Personally I've seen DS3 get a lot of support and thrive in mainstream, but a) he's miles ahead academically so can afford to miss lessons when he has to b) he runs off which triggers support c) he loves learning from books and 121 with an adult so the basic mainstream model of 121 support alongside class is good for him d) he's quite a sporty, determined little thing so not that easy to bully.

Which doesn't mean mainstream can't work for your DD but if you can delay her and use that time to get an EHCP to get her help in mainstream and open doors to specialist - and figure out what specialist options are - that may well be the right approach.

Does DD have an EHCP?

If not, mainstream schools can’t refuse to accept her because of her SEN.

If she does, DC have a right to a mainstream education (although not necessarily a right to a specific MS) unless it would be incompatible with the efficient education of others, and there are no reasonable steps that could avoid the incompatibility. Being non-verbal (although it doesn’t sound like DD is non-verbal?) wouldn’t meet this high threshold.

Having said that, SS differ. Not all have DC with VCB. Some teach a mainstream curriculum. You would need an EHCP for an SS.

If DD doesn’t have an EHCP, you should request an EHCNA.

Thank you, that is really helpful.

I understand at present if there is an EHCP in place you cannot request for your child to start CSA into reception and they would move straight into year 1 on the basis of them being supported but I think reception is too important to miss. I am hoping they change the rules for this over the summer. I do think another year would do DD the world of good in play-based environment.

You are not the first person to mention selective mutism - when I asked about this, the therapist dismissed it straight away saying those with SM are not delayed, they just do not speak in certain environments where as DD is still delayed at home. I disagree - and I do wonder if she spends five days a week not talking for most of the day, surely that will impact her overall speech development?

And you are so right - the quiet children do seem to be overlooked and appear to be more 'babysat' rather than actively helped to learn. So much to consider! I think school viewings may be helpful too when the time comes.

At my Ds's primary, there are non verbal DC in reception. Absolutely non verbal DC can and do go to mainstream schools.
Mainstream primaries are used to supporting DC with speech and language/social communication needs. There will be at least two or three in every class.

In terms of applying to primaries, I would try and make appointments at the schools your DD is most likely to go to. Ask to see the Senco. Sound them out as to how they support DC with a profile like your DD's.
Some schools are better than others at SEN support. Providing the school isn't fully independent though, they must use best endeavours to support DC with SEN.

In terms of deferring her place for a year. This is also possible. You will need to speak to your Local Authority about that though.

You are right - DC can change dramatically at such a young age. My DS was completely non verbal at 3 then went to speaking in full sentences by 4.5.

I would also warn you that in terms of actual ring-fenced support for your DD, the only way you will be able to guarantee that is via an EHCP.

Ipsea has some good info what's worth looking at in terms of what schools/the local authority should be doing to support DC and also about applying for an EHCP:

https://www.ipsea.org.uk/Pages/Category/get-support

If DC are summer born you can request they start reception regardless of whether there is an EHCP or not.

SM can co-exist alongside a speech delay or speech disorder.