Toilet training

[Emeraldrings]

I still have over a year to go but I'm worried. 3 year old DS has very limited language still (been waiting for SALT appointment for ages) and can't communicate when he needs the toilet . DS has quite a bit of development delay in other areas but not bad enough to not attend mainstream (Ithink as nursery haven't said anything).. He also won't sit on the potty without clothes on, although he will with clothes on!
What do I do if he still can't communicate by next September? Would I be right in assuming school won't take him if he's not trained? Or will they but I'll have to go in and change him?

The school won’t be able to refuse to admit DS because he isn’t toilet trained. Nor should they call you in to change him.

Does DS have an EHCP? If not, you should request an EHCNA.

Nursery are in the process of preparing an EHCP for him and have put other plans in place (almost like an EHCP) for him since he was about 2
I have two older children who were fully toilet trained before they were 2 and a 1/2, despite one of them being autistic. So I don't really know what happens if he's not toilet trained. Fingers crossed he will be but I don't want to push it and make it in to a huge deal.

The school can’t refuse to accept DS because he isn’t toilet trained and they shouldn’t ask you to go in to change him.

Has an EHCNA request actually been submitted to the LA? If not, you should make the request ASAP. The process takes 20 weeks if you don’t have to appeal, but many do have to appeal, sometimes more than once, so you need all the time you can get.

@Emeraldrings I thought I would just add our experience of the communication about needing the toilet issue. Admittedly we did wait to attempt toilet training with DD until just before she turned 4 but she was still not able to communicate she needed the toilet when we started. There were a lot of accidents for the first 2 weeks after which she figured out how to hold but would usually tell us just before or after she had an accident. We became quite good at guessing when she needed to go by her body language/ went to the toilet at fairly set times. But 2 months in she was fairly consistent at telling us when she needed to go and accidents are very infrequent now. It was a gradual process for her to be able to communicate that need but I felt that the process of toilet training itself helped her to understand IYSWIM? She didn’t have much functional language until the beginning of this year but has improved a lot with both understanding and speech although she’s still very far off from her peers. She’s 4 and a bit now and starting school in September in a specialist unit attached to a mainstream school. Having said all of that I don’t believe that schools can refuse children who aren't toilet trained like PPs say so you shouldn’t feel pressured to try before you feel DS is ready. Just thought may be helpful to hear our experience a year down the line