Options for secondary edu for highly anxious / sensitive girl

[coffeeneedsmummy]

Hello wise mums!

I'm driving myself round the bend looking for options for my daughter. She is in Yr5, cries every day not wanting to go to school - this is despite going to a small, nurturing, independent primary. She is such a people pleaser and rule follower so doesn't "refuse school" / have attendance issues, but it breaks my heart as I know how unhappy she is... She is having therapy for a phobia and experiences separation anxiety. School are supportive, but also want her in lessons etc. She loved lockdown / online learning and ideally wants to be home-schooled but that's just not possible for us to do financially.

What other options are there other than home schooling (where the parents are the educators)?

Do you know of any good small, nurturing, therapeutic secondary schools where a child with mental health difficulties might thrive?

Happy to consider mainstream, specialist, state-funded or independent and don't care where it is, so long as it's in the UK!

Would really appreciate any and all suggestions. I'm open to trying anything to help her.

Thanks so much.

Does DD have an EHCP? If so, that can open the door to a specialist school placement. The majority of special schools require an EHCP, whilst a minority of independent special schools allow parents to self fund it can be expensive.

You could look at New Forest Special school, Alderwasley Hall, Beech Lodge, some of Cavendish’s schools, some of Aspris’s schools. Does DD have ASD? If she does there will be other options too. If she doesn’t it might be worth an assessment.

Or if there isn’t an appropriate school there is EOTAS, which is Education Otherwise Than At School. It is a bespoke package tailored to individual needs, for example it could include tuition or online schooling, therapies, alternative provision and so much more. But the big difference is you, as parents, aren’t responsible for funding, organising, delivering it.

If DD doesn’t have an EHCP you should request an EHCNA.

Naomicfisher on twitter is good on this, as is the notfineinschool website.

Might not be the right thing but ideas
https://wemms.co.uk/
https://www.redballoonlearner.org/students-parents/help-advice/
https://limpsfieldgrange.co.uk/ if autistic

Limpsfield Grange is an ASD SS, unless OP’s DD has a diagnosis (and an EHCP) they won’t admit.

That’s why I said if autistic
another couple of ideas to throw into the mix
http://eger-roth.co.uk/
https://canburyschool.co.uk/
https://www.newforestsmallschool.com/

@Mary19 apologies I obviously didn’t read your post correctly as I missed that part.

Thanks so much for all the suggestions. I will make my way through them now. We've not yet requested EHCP as things were improving and it is so difficult to get a plan for well behaved, academically okay but highly anxious children. But since things have started to decline again, i was going to raise it with SENCO so that specialist provision can be an option, if needed. DD's had a private ASC assessment, and outcome was that it's not autism. She's currently on the waiting list for CAMHS but no idea when she will be seen.

Request an EHCNA, and appeal if refused. On their website IPSEA have a model letter you can use. It is possible to get an EHCP for academically able DC without behaviour difficulties. You should apply ASAP because if you need to appeal as many do the waits are long.