School wants to assess for autism

[Cobey]

My DS is five. His teacher thinks he has autism and has asked me to discuss and sign paperwork for a referral.

I’m not sure this is a good idea and wondering if I should block it.

DS is articulate, intelligent and knows loads of things that even I don’t know. His speech is fine and his vocabulary is excellent. He makes eye contact, points, doesn’t make repetitive movements, plays imaginatively and doesn’t line toys up. Not at all what I would expect from an autistic child.

The teacher says he doesn’t do what he’s told, he wants to do what he wants to do. He frequently gets told off for not listening and not behaving. Last week he was removed from lunch for squashing it with his hands and putting his face in it (he knows perfectly well how to use a fork). This week he was removed for running round the classroom and refusing to sit down. She also says he’s “on the edge of the group socially” and wants to play his choice of game not join in with what the others want to play. He gets upset about changing task because he wants to continue with what he’s currently doing. He likes to have the same thing for breakfast every day at the breakfast club.

I’m just not sure this sounds like autism. And mostly I don’t want DS labelled at an early age. DH thinks we can’t refuse otherwise questions will be asked about why we’re refusing recommended medical assessments and social services will get involved. Advice please?

I would listen to the SENCO. If they feel there is a need for further assessment then personally I would listen.

Autism presents in a variety of ways. Nothing you have written rules out autism.

A diagnosis isn’t a label. Would you say the same about asthma or diabetes?

You have nothing to lose by the assessment, that's exactly what it is and they won't diagnose unless it's warranted. But remember teachers see a lot more children than just yours and, while they're not experts, will know that his behaviour is different to his peers and the SENCO especially has probably seen quite a few autistic children unless it's a really small school. DD's school does seem to have more than most, but the SENCO said they average about one per class.

The wait time for an autism assessment where I am is currently 2 to 3 years. By the time your DS gets seen, it may well be that his differences (if there are any) will have become more or less pronounced and you can make the decision then.

Obviously no one here can say if your DS is or isn't on the spectrum but the presentation of autism can be quite subtle, especially in younger children and you're not trained to see the signals.

Many people with autism are intelligent and articulate - look at Chris Packham for example.

Grab it with both hands!
I've been pushing for an assessment for years for my child but because she masks at school it's took until year 4 to get one.
We are now on the waiting list but it's a 42 week wait just for initial appointment.
Honestly the senco must have concerns to even offer a referral.