Obtaining an autism diagnosis for a 17yo girl who has left school?

[headache]

First of all we are in Scotland so different to English system.

DD2 is almost 17 she left school at the end of 5th year with 5 Highers (not great results one A the rest B/Cs) after getting 7 As in Nat 5s) she was only going to stay on to do Advanced Higher Art as she wants to go to uni to study art. She went to college and it has been amazing for her, away from school she has flourished made friends and is really enjoying it.

School was terrible for her, she was masking just before lockdown and was in a bullying situation. She wouldn’t tell me exactly what happened but she ended up having trichotillomania pulling her hair out with stress. Around about this time I clicked she had ASD it just all came together, I moved into teaching children with ASD started doing a lot of courses and came across girls with ASD who masked and the penny dropped its DD2. Spoke to her and she agreed. She’s a very intelligent girl, read very early, is very talented at art but struggles with anything social and communication. It was good for her as she said she always felt weird or odd.

I spoke to the school who pot me in contact with the ASD support teacher who crackly was useless. DD2 didn’t need any support but we wanted her teachers just to know that she hated being singled out in class, being asked questions made her nervous and awkward. I also asked about getting her a diagnosis which they said they would do. I know covid etc but nothing happened her teachers never knew. So she was miserable and left.

Now I don’t know how we go about getting her officially diagnosed is it the GP, I know through my own work there’s a 3 year waiting list is private an option? Just that I want her to get support and the diagnosis before uni?

In some areas you can self refer for an NHS assessment, if not you can ask the GP. You can go private if you want.

What kind of support are you meaning? Much support is based on needs rather than diagnosis.

Have you spoken to the college?

Firstly DSA, Disabled Students Allowance she struggles with public transport a lot, the whole getting buses, waiting on them, them not turning up, them being too full and going past them she’s late. Now she’s almost 17 she can get driving lessons but we don’t know how she will cope, how long it will take for her to pass etc.

Mainly, I think for her it’s for the validation of the official diagnosis. She can say I have autism she can have a quiet place to study and extra time in exams etc that sort of support. She hates talking to people especially anyone in authority like lecturers or teachers.

I do believe a diagnosis is important for an understanding of oneself. However, a diagnosis isn’t required for reasonable adjustments and DSA.

How are you getting along OP?

We are in England and I have a DD 17 almost 18. I am really struggling with her (see my post from this morning). I have no advice and could have written your post (my daughter also pulls her hair out and really hates any attention or being singled out for being good or bad). However, unlike your DD mine refuses to accept any indication that she may need to see the GP or she could possibly be a little ND or accept any help or support whatsoever.

On a positive note for you my daughter has learned to drive. We booked her some lessons with an instructor and although we often have quite a volatile relationship she was actually quite calm in the car.

@JanuaryBlues2023 sorry you are going through this too to be honest we haven’t don’t much as yet DD has college work deadlines and this has been stressing her out a bit. Not the actual work but tech not working etc. Her provisional license arrived and she ready to go with lessons.

I was talking to her last night and I was saying you know I keep getting these TikTok’s about women who have ASD and like the 5 main signs and the are so you and she said I get them too. Then we had a good laugh about when she was little and obsessed with dinosaurs for about 10 years and how she would correct all the films. Her sister was asking her about obsessions she was saying but I like things a bit but you’re like obsessed and DD2 was explaining that it’s all you think about. She’s very articulate about explaining how she feels sometimes. She understands her ASD is probably why she could read very early and has always been good at writing and drawing things she can lose herself in for hours.

it’s interesting too as she has had one friend from the age of 2 and the two of them have been inseparable. They could be described as a pair of misfits not your average teenage girls, they have the same interests, dress a bit different etc her best friend is autistic too