Wrong decision calling the police.

[EmotionalWreckingBall]

Hi, I have another thread running but don't know how to link them.

My son has some kind of sen going on, possibly PDA.

He has a lot of violence towards me & I've spoken to the police about him trying to get hold of a knife to 'murder me' the other week.
They told me that I should absolutely call them if anything else happens & said to look at it as them stepping in before he gets into a situation that he can't get out of (which made sense to me)

So after 2 hours of violence last night I called them. They came & she told me that if the violence doesn't stop, he will be removed. After she left she said that if I call her again (last night) then they will take him.

This isn't what I want & I'm now terrified that I've started the ball rolling with SS & the only option seems to be to take him from me

I have Family First involved who I saw yesterday daytime & they said 'If things escalate to calling the police then make sure you tell them you are waiting on a diagnosis & they will send somebody who knows about those things'.

I did this, mentioned several times during the phonecall & again when she arrived & also pointed out that I have the completed forms to go back to school, right there on the table.

She asked me what I wanted the outcome to be & I said 'I know he can't help it, I just want the violence to stop'.

But their solution is to just take him... I won't be calling them again if that's all they can do.

Please be kind to me. I've made a massive mistake calling them havn't I?
How do I fix this?
She's now told him that he will be taken from me if he doesn't stop the behaviour that he can't help

Anybody?

It is highly unlikely that he will taken from you. SS have basically no placements for teenagers, so as long as you don't want him to be taken into care and are taking good enough care of him, he will stay with you.

You might get a call from ss about safeguarding, so think about the measures you are taking, eg. storing knives in places that are not easyily accessible. Mention that you are waiting for a diagnosis and that you are in contact with Family First. Police and SS need to be able to document that they have made sure that you are aware of risks and are trying to minimise them as best as you can. Have you done a Non-Violent Resistence (NVR) course? If not, you might want to do that. Search for Haim Omer on youtube.

I would contact the police and ask for an explanation of their processes. Make sure to take notes and/or ask for links online or an email, so you have something in writing and you know their policies and your rights.

Thank you for answering me Yolande I appreciate it.

Yes, I spoke to the school family liaisons officer & she was a bit confused about why she said they'd take him too. She asked if they meant take him as in arrest him? As he's not 10 yet they can't do that.

I said no she said live with somebody else. She thought the police woman was just saying that to my son to scare him but I said after the kids were put to bed she stood in my hallway with just me & said if he doesn't settle/if I call them again tonight then they will remove him & also in the future as they won't leave him here being violent.

I'm 100% not going to call them again, if that's all they are going to say, I'll just put up with it. She said 'You obviously can't cope'.

I am doing the NVR training in a few months time. I'm happy to talk to SS about Safeguarding, I spoke to the school, family first & his support worker about this incident (well I contacted her, she didn't answer me) so I'm getting all the support that I can.

I'm just really scared now that they are going to take my children away.

That's not what I ever wanted. But if it's for the best then they can take them.

Maybe they are right & I'm not coping.