Non verbal ASD child in mainstream school

[folly115]

My ASD niece is currently in reception at a mainstream school and thriving. She absolutely loves school and the school are amazing. she is non verbal and she can't write or even mark make. She is locked in her own little world and nothing phases her. She is so compliant she will do anything or go anywhere. The chaoticness of a classroom or the noise doesn't bother her. She is one of the happiest children I know and she adores going to school - however because she can't communicate no one knows what she knows. She will occasionally say the word red on repeat but whether she knows the actual colour we don't know. She has a full time 1-1 who is great with her but they don't do any formal learning with her as she can't sit still for more than 2 minutes. She does alot of stimming screaming and excited shouting noises.

The problem my sister has is that her DP will not consider a special school for her. He wants her in mainstream and he has no expectations for her to ever excel academically but because her current school are so brilliant he wants her to stay there as long as possible - in year 1 there is an expectation to do more formal classroom work but he wants the TA to just carry on doing what she is doing which is basically walking her round the field and letting her lie in the sensory hub looking at the lights.

I think she would excel in the right environment but BIL will not budge. Any ideas of how we could convince him to have a look in a special school or as anyone any positives of how a very compliant non verbal child with no fears can excel in a mainstream school. Maybe he is right??

however because she can't communicate no one knows what she knows.

This stood out for me. Just because DN is non-verbal doesn’t necessarily mean she can’t communicate. Does she not use/learning to use AAC? Does she have SALT and OT?

There are some non-verbal/pre-verbal DC who thrive in mainstream primary, especially in the lower years.

Could DN stay in reception?

My BIL is fighting for her to be back yeared as he feels this would be her best option. He just sees how happy she is at her current school - he doesn't expect the school to teach her anything academic or formal - he just wants them to carry on next year doing exactly the same as this year. She has a SALT who comes in to school who apparently is very helpful. My sister would like her to be given the opportunity to learn and to be able to access the facilities a special school has to offer. BIL is scared she won't thrive in a SS because she won't be around NT children.

Hi, my friends son is non verbal and nine now. He started off at reception in a mainstream with 1-2-1 support and carried on there for a few years. Like your bil my friend and her hubby wanted him to stay around NT children and not in a special needs school. Fast forward a few years down the line and she says it’s the biggest mistake she ever made! She feels he was more ‘baby sat’ than anything else and he would have probably excelled more in a special school.. she is struggling to find a suitable school for him now.

Primary school TA here (and also mother to an autistic of Secondary age).

I afraid I agree with the post above. While I think there can be lots of benefit for some autistic children to stay in the mainstream environment, that environment is by and large often overwhelming for them, and they have to expend an enormous amount of energy just coping with the scale, the noise, number of bodies and relative chaos that is mainstream Primary. Those who benefit are those who are able to interact with their peers and are sufficiently able to absorb, assimilate and progress through the social and academic environment and opportunities embodied by the mainstream school experience - and to do so in the main happily and without undue stress.

It may be that your niece understands much more than she is able to express, which would be wonderful, and would hopefully be an area that would develop, but mainstream school is not necessarily the best place to make that happen. Frankly, mainstream schools may not be set up for autistic children with more severe needs - they (not always but often) can end up at best ‘managing’ behaviour and providing a safe environment (ie babysitting). Your niece could repeat the Nursery year, but after that she would have to move into Y1, where demands increase, and expectations are higher. Your BIL may feel that if she and the school are happy with her just doing her thing then that could continue with no problem, but when the gulf between what a child can manage/access and what their peers are doing really starts to widen, going up the years, in my experience it does not help a child being surrounded by non-autistic peers if they cannot interact with them - it is isolating for them, and the peers - sadly - can lose interest/compassion the older and more self-aware they themselves become. Another thing to bear in mind is that mainstream teachers and TA’s are unlikely to have had training in how to really respond to and advance children with more severe needs, and you don’t want to end up with a situation in the future where you end up feeling that the determination to keep a child in mainstream actually, sadly, represents a waste of the CHILD’S time - years when they could have been having intensive, tailored help to work on speech development and fundamental life skills, that they missed out on as this is not a part of mainstream schooling. If your niece is as easygoing about her environment as your description suggests then she might be just as happy in a special school - happier even, if her needs are better met there?

She sounds exactly like my son who is now 23, almost exactly the same. I also didn’t want to consider a special school. As he got older some behaviours started. When he moved into year 3 I visited about 40 schools eventually settling on one I felt was ok, not perfect but best of a bad bunch. Things went slowly downhill from there. He had 6 , 1:1’s, there was no consistency. He was easily bored and then he started with aggressive behaviours towards other children. I was called several times a week to pick him up. He’d gone from absolutely loving school and being so easy to the complete opposite. In the middle of year 3 I realised we had come to the end of mainstream and looked around for a special school for him. We found one and fell in love with it straight away. After a particularly bad week at school we told the head we would not be sending him back until they came up with a plan to support his needs. The head admitted they couldn’t meet his needs so I called an emergency review and he moved about 4 weeks later to the special school. It was the best thing we ever did. Our happy little boy came back, the aggression disappeared. The best thing though was he started to actually learn stuff, there was in an house SALT and OT and best of all other parents in the same situation to get support from.

it’s been one long educational battle since then though, getting the right support for him. He’s currently at an amazing residential college but finishes there in a July.

He needs to look around a specialist school and see what she is missing out on - also can he find again evidence that being in mainstream is helpful for those with severe needs ?

I so wish he would but he is refusing, he just sees how happy she is at school and how she cries at the weekend for school and as soon as he puts her in her school uniform on Monday morning she is ecstatic. The teachers have told him she has doesn't interact with any children but she sings and laughs all day. She had her first meltdown at school last week - she is very amiable and not frightened or scared of noise or other children so the 1-1 took her to assembly and she loved it so much she screamed and shouted with excitement and starting skipping round the hall - the deputy head asked for her to be removed as all the children were distracted and he couldn't give his assembly. This was first time she has ever cried at school.

BIL's reaction when my sister told him was that they need to tolerate her as it is not inclusion so maybe if more instances happen like this he may realise that a mainstream school isn't for her. My sister is going to start the ball rolling and start looking. She knows her DD will thrive at a SS. He is adamant it will not happen - it is causing a lot of friction in their house at the moment.