ADOS assessment?

[ihearttc]

Will try to keep this as brief as possible.

DS2 is 11 and in Y6. He has always been extremely hard work. He is very arguementative, has to be in control of everything, gets very anxious if things change and struggles with friendships. Academically he is quite able but struggles with organisation and often doesn’t finish work.
He had an awful Y5, really disliked teacher (literally an immediate dislike on Day 1 which continued the whole year). This year has been much better as his teacher is very strict and loves routine which is perfect for him. SENCo has said she believes there is something else going on, but not entirely sure what. He has the hugest meltdowns at home nearly every day although at first glance will appear very polite and ultra compliant and masks very well at school.
NHS wait times here are between 2-3 years. We cannot wait that long so we are seeing a consultant privately (same as on NHS) and we have an initial appointment in 4 weeks. She has indicated that it’s likely he’ll need an ADOS assessment which I think is an ASD assessment? After googling it seems to suggest that it will involve role play etc? How will that work for an astute 11 year old as I can’t imagine him pretending to feed a doll or clean teeth etc?

My Ds has had two Ados assessments. One at 4 and another at 9. I believe there are several 'levels' depending on the age and the language/cognitive ability of the DC.

The one he had at 4 was much more along the lines of 'playing tea parties'. I stayed in the room answering questions while he interacted with two other professionals.

For the second one, he was in a separate room with two professionals while I answered a LOT of questions. There was a two-way mirror though so I could still see him.
As I wasn't in the room, I can't say for sure what the Ados involved, and my Ds isn't the best relayer of information! However, I know it was much more structured around conversation. I seem to recall they showed him a picture/comic book and asked him to talk about the story, what happened next.

They also talked to him about friends - what makes a friend, why do people have friends.
I was concerned that because he's much better at interacting with adults than his peers that they wouldn't 'see' his difficulties.

He did get a diagnosis on the day though and when the report came through I was amazed at how they had completely grasped his difficulties.
The diagnosis process isn't just based on the Ados. They will take into account what you've said too.
It would be helpful if you can start jotting down what you can remember from birth onwards - eg when he crawled, walked, talked. Examples of what triggered any meltdowns etc.

My Ds enjoyed both his Ados experiences. He didn't find them stressful in any way.

Good luck!

Thank you so much, that’s really helpful. It sounds strange but I’m quite looking forward to it. I’ve felt there is something else going on for so long and I just want someone else to see him how I see him. I don’t know if all his foibles that we base our life around is just him being him or if there is something else going on.
He has quite a complicated medical history as was born prematurely so will log down the most important bits.

There are 4 different modules depending on age/ language ability. For children/ young teens it is more 'play based' but it's not feeding a doll (not for the older children anyway!). I think as a parent I'd try not to research too much about the assessment process and definitely don't discuss with dc. The clinician will explain briefly what will happen and then discuss outcome afterwards. When I introduce it to children I just say 'we're going to do a few tasks/ activities etc'.