What are the steps to get a teen assessed?

[Spaghettio]

We would like to get our DS (13) assessed for any possible diagnosis - we've become increasingly concerned over the last year or so but it's really ramped up over the past few months.

We've spoken to the Head of Individual Needs at his school and they've assessed him and determined that he has issues with rapid-naming and short-term auditory memory. This means he's now been given extra time in his exams.

However we are concerned also about his ability to socialise and pick up on social cues as well as his behaviour, which is detrimental to his ability to make friends.

Who do we ask to get him assessed even more? I think (from Dr Google and talking to friends who are in the health/education sector) he is on the spectrum but high functioning which is why it's taken this long for us to notice anything amiss.

Do we speak to the school again? Ask for an educational psychologist? Speak to the GP?

We have the ability to go privately if that will help, but we're a bit in the dark as to how to progress. We need a diagnosis for him as well strategies for us to be able to help him with everything.

You can ask the Senco to refer your DS onto their list for an EP appointment. Schools buy in a set number of EP hours a term though and it may be that they feel your DS isn't high on their list, especially if they feel he is 'coping'.

I pushed for 5 years to get my DS seen by an EP at school. If further down the line, you decide to go for an EHCP then he will have to be seen by an EP as part of that process. An EP can't diagnose autism but they can recommend strategies to help your DS access learning.

In terms of getting your DS seen for a possible autism diagnosis, you can make an appointment with his GP and also with the school Senco to sound them out.

Make a list of all your concerns. The GP or Senco can then refer on to either a community paediatrician or CAMHS, depending on where you live.
They act as the 'gatekeepers' who will then see you and your DS and take loads of history. They will ask things like when he walked, talked, did he crawl, point etc so it's a good idea to try and make a note of these things if you can remember!

If they feel your DS warrants it, he will then be added to the wait list for an assessment. Just to warn you that in my area, the wait list is currently 2-3 years. You may be lucky with a cancellation though. We looked at going private and were told at the time the wait list would be just under a year so a fairly big difference. The cost was around £3,000 from memory (this was a few years ago).

Have you spoken to your DS about his difficulties? Obviously as he's 13, he will be involved/aware of the process. The GP will probably want to see/speak to him.

My DS got his diagnosis at 9. He's 12 now. Having a diagnosis has helped him enormously as he understands there's a reason why he struggles with certain aspects of life. We talk about 'neurodiversity' to try and emphasis that difference can be a positive thing.

• Sorry. I should have clarified: An EP can be part of the team involved in an autism assessment but if they are called in by the school, they will be looking at specific barriers to learning.

@Toomanyminifigs thank you so much. That was fabulously comprehensive.